


i am you

by jikwaniser



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Catfishing, Fluff and Crack, I mean LIGHT, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Light Smut, M/M, Mild Language, Some Plot, i mean microscopic, little angst, minho just wants a sugar daddy, text fic, this is all a mess im sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-16
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2019-08-24 06:54:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 16,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16635053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jikwaniser/pseuds/jikwaniser
Summary: minho's broke and wants a sugar daddy, what is a better way than to catfish some unsuspecting tinder user?unless the tinder user you're catfishing is the one in the photos.





	1. i.

_dance class_

 

leeknow: GUYS

 

_dancejin has come online_

 

dancejin: hyung? what’s going on?

leeknow: I was scrolling on Twitter, you know like every college kid

leeknow: And I came across these selfies of the HOTTEST guy

 

_freckles has come online_

 

freckls: hello

freckles: love how you come when minho mentions hot guys

freckles: i’m straight!

dancejin: and so is spaghetti until you get it steamy★~(◡ω⊙✿)

leeknow: Anyway, as I was saying

leeknow: I’m gonna use these selfies of Mr. Hunky to get myself a sugar daddy(づ￣ ³￣)づ

dancejin: hey! i thought i was your sugar daddy!

leeknow: Getting me a coupon for a free ice cream you found on the floor doesn’t count

freckles: wait hyung

freckles: how are you going to find a sugar daddy?

leeknow: They have sugar daddy websites right?

dancejin: just use tinder and catfish someone

dancejin: tinder is reliable for that kinda stuff

freckles: true

leeknow: Fine, I’ll use Tinder then

freckles: this is so exciting

dancejin: much more exciting than this history lecture!

freckles: hyunjin you don’t even take history

dancejin: yeah but changbin does ♥‿♥

freckles: gross

leeknow: Would agree but I’m catfishing random people so I can have coffee money

dancejin: you’re both jealous that i have a boyfriend and you dont!

freckles: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

leeknow: Tinder: downloaded

leeknow: Hunky’s selfies: saved

leeknow: Catfishing: activated

freckles: minho-hyung fighting

  


Minho felt his heart rate pick up as he clicked on the “add photo” button, clicking on the stranger’s [selfie](https://scontent-atl3-1.cdninstagram.com/vp/c25e2cae8c7aa6c76431a418462f9b93/5C5E263C/t51.2885-15/e35/41402080_2202098033410361_3493903872317003067_n.jpg) and adding it to his account before saving his profile.

“Now,” he cracked his knuckles, “let’s get a sugar daddy!”

Minho scrolled through accounts for a bit, no one gaining his interest until he came across one photo. The guy only had two pictures, one of [him and a friend](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DVFjhq2VMAI7v79.jpg:large) (Minho couldn’t tell which one was supposed to be Chan) and an [old selfie](https://i.pinimg.com/236x/ac/51/e8/ac51e8861f7e9ec91ad226767029e74c.jpg) with his face covered by a mask.

Minho bit his lip, he couldn’t really see the guy’s face so it was hard to judge how attractive he was but he was a year older than Minho, according to his profile, and went to the same school as him. Minho swiped right before he could change his mind, shocked to see that Chan had swiped right earlier, the “YOU HAVE A NEW MATCH” flashing on his screen.

Minho grinned and went to the messages, ready to ask him for dinner, or even coffee when Minho's worst nightmare happened.

 

Chan: Hey uh, this is awkward

CHan: But that’s me in those selfies

 

Minho was silent, reading the message three times before screaming and nearly throwing his phone.

  


_dance class_

 

leeknow: EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY!

freckles: what happened?

leeknow: I MATCHED WITH MR HUNKY ON TINDER

leeknow: USING HIS OWN SELFIES

dancejin: oh my god…

freckles: THIS IS SO FUNNY

leeknow: SHUT UP THIS IS SERIOUS!!!!

dancejin: what’d you say hyung?

dancejin: “sorry saw these hot selfies on twitter and used them to get a sugar daddy٩◔‿◔۶”

leeknow: Do you know how uncomfortable that would be!?

freckles: what else do you tell him?

leeknow: I could always ignore him

dancejin: or you could have your dreams come true and be happy you matched with “mr hunky”

leeknow: …. I’ll be right back

 

_leeknow has left the chat_

 

freckles: $20 he gets his KKT

dancejin: oh you’re on

  


Minho frantically opened Tinder back up, happy to see Chan hadn’t unmatched him yet.

 

Minho: Look I can explain!

Minho: Okay not really, I just saw your selfies on Twitter and thought you were hot and I was gonna use them to catfish people into buying me dinner or coffee

Minho: Like a sugar daddy…

 

Minho stared at the message screen, his eyes not blinking.

 

Chan: You think I’m hot?

Minho: I mean, obviously. It’s why I chose your selfies.

Chan: You know what, I’m not even mad you used my selfies.

Chan: But I’ll be even happier if I could see what you actually look like, it’s weird flirting with myself.

 

Minho choked, his face heating up. He quickly opened his camera app, positioning to the right angle before snapping a few selfies. He scanned over them, choosing his favorite and quickly sent it to Chan.

 

Minho: 

Chan: Are you catfishing me again?

Minho: No! I swear this is really me!

Chan: You’re hot, idk why you’d use my pictures when you look like a model.

Minho: Haha, I’m not a model. Just a broke college kid.

Chan: How about I take you out for coffee then?

Minho: You’d be my sugar daddy!?

Chan: Minho, it’s a $3 coffee. I’m not buying you a new phone.

Minho: Worth a shot, I’d love coffee.

Chan: Here’s my KKT, I’ll text you when I’m out of class. [ _contact information attached_ ]

 

_3rachass_

 

trashbin: chan who in the world are you texting?

 

_chantheman has logged on_

 

chantheman: What makes you think I’m texting someone?

han: you never smile at your phone like that

chantheman: Maybe I was watching a funny video

trashbin: who were you texting

chantheman: This guy on Tinder tried catfishing me with my own selfies

han: did you yell at him??

chantheman: No I’m buying him coffee

trashbin: im sorry

trashbin: what?

chantheman: He said he wanted a sugar daddy so I said I would buy him coffee

han: you mean to tell me

han: you’re buying your catfish coffee

han: but when you ran over my foot with your bike

han: you told me, and i quote, “walk it off’

chantheman: It wasn’t that bad of an injury Jisung

han: I BROKE MY FOOT! IN THREE PLACES!

trashbin: was mr catfish cute?

chantheman: Extremely

han: this is coming from the same guy who said mr. park was cute

chantheman: He was!

trashbin: he was like thirty something and had big ass glasses

chantheman: He had astigmatism don’t be rude

han: until i see mr catfish, i dont trust your taste in men

trashbin: do you trust my taste sung?

han: youre dating hyunjin so obviously i do

trashbin: mwah

chantheman:

 

han: hello!

trashbin: maybe chan has a brain cell after all

chantheman: Pay attention in class I’m tired of you guys

han: yes dad

trashbin: yes daddy

chantheman: I’m going to block you

trashbin: understandable have a nice day

  


_NEW MESSAGE_

 

minho.lee98: Chan?

minho.lee98: It’s Minho ^.^

chrisbang: Minho! Hey!

chrisbang: I just get out of class give me ten and I’ll meet you outside the science building

minho.lee98: Sure thing

minho.lee98: Wait, why is your name Chris?

chrisbang: Oh! Chris is my English name, I’m from Australia. I moved here recently so I’ve only gone by Chan for a little while. Felix’s the one who made my KKT anyway.

minho.lee98: Felix?

chrisbang: Yeah, do you know him?

minho.lee98: Yeah! Didn’t realize there was another Australian at this school.

bangchan: Haha, we’re the only two.

minho.lee98: How do you know Felix?

chrisbang: He’s my stepbrother

minho.lee98: Wait. Wait. You’re THAT Chris??

 

_dance class_

 

leeknow: Felix.

freckles: yeah?

leeknow: Why didn’t you tell me your stepbrother was the hottest person alive.

freckles: what?

leeknow: Mr. Hunk is Chris. Bang Chan. Your stepbrother.

 

_dancejin has come online_

 

dancejin: this keeps getting better and better

  


_woojin and the kids_

 

wooj: Bang Chan.

lilinnie: is hyung getting in trouble?? .ʕʘ‿ʘʔ.

mydaysintl: what did hyung do this time?

bangdad: Who told you? I bet it was Jisung.

wooj: are you seriously buying coffee for someone who tried catfishing you!!!!

lilinnie: catfish? like the animal?

mydaysintl: i’ll tell you later

wooj: YOU WILL NOT!

bangdad: It’s not a big deal Wooj, he apologized and it’s just one coffee.

wooj: sure one coffee now

wooj: what happens when one coffee turns into a dinner? or a phone? or a house?

bangdad: Jesus Christ, I’m not his sugar daddy!

lilinnie: wait hyung

lilinnie: who are you buying coffee for?

bangdad: This kid named Minho

mydaysintl: wait

mydaysintl: lee minho?

wooj: you know him??

bangdad: Not surprised

mydaysintl: he dances with hyunjin and felix

bangdad: HE WHAT?

 


	2. ii.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> han: kiss him or no balls
> 
> chantheman: Shut the fuck up!
> 
> trashbin: no balls chan

_new message_

 

chrisbang: You and Felix dance together??

minho.lee98: Yeah

minho.lee98: Has he never mentioned me??

chrisbang: He might have I don't remember

minho.lee98: Did he ever mention having a hottie on his dance team?

chrisbang: I know who Hyunjin is

minho.lee98: I’m better looking.

chrisbang: I’ve only seen that one photo of you so I don’t have an opinion

minho.lee98: I can send more if you’d like. (◕‿-)

chrisbang: Feel like I don’t have a choice.

minho.lee98:

 

 

 

 

chrisbang: Okay I get it.

minho.lee98: You agree I’m hot?

chrisbang: I think you’re nice looking.

minho.lee98: I’ll take it.

chrisbang: Hey my class is almost over

chrisbang: Give me five and I’ll meet you outside

minho.lee98: See you then!

  


_3rachass_

 

trashbin: chan hyung?

trashbin: are you dead?

chantheman: Jisung, I am going to kill you.

 

_han has come online_

 

han: what the hell did i do?

chantheman: Exist.

trashbin: lmao

chantheman: Did you seriously tell Woojin about Minho??

han: i had to!!! he saw our messages and threatened me!!

trashbin: woojin hyung threatened you?

han: he promised to buy me ice cream…

chantheman: You threw me under the bus for ice cream??

han: he promised me two scoops!

trashbin: what did wooj say exactly?

chantheman: [ _screenshot.img_ ]

han: can we add innie to our gc?

chantheman: NOT THE POINT

chantheman: And no I don’t trust you two with him.

trashbin: hey!

chantheman: You call me daddy

trashbin: but you are daddy

han: im tellin hyunjin

trashbin: do it coward! i dare you!

chantheman: This is exactly why I won’t let him join.

trashbin: nevermind all that

trashbin: did you meet minho for coffee?

chantheman: Yeah, I did.

chantheman: He’s in the bathroom right now.

trashbin: is he hot in person?

han: i bet chan has made a fool of himself

chantheman: He is and I have not.

trashbin: not yet

chantheman: He’s coming back, I’ll text you later.

han: kiss him or no balls

chantheman: Shut the fuck up!

trashbin: no balls chan

 

_trashbin has changed chantheman’s name to noballs_

_noballs has gone offline_

 

han: what if

han: i made a new chat with all of us

trashbin: who is all of us?

han: 3racha, wooj, the kids, and dance line

trashbin: wait youre adding minho?

han: duh

trashbin: chans gonna kill you

trashbin: do it

han: lemme get minhos kkt from lix hold on

 

_do you remember~~~_

 

jisunghyung: whats minhos kkt no questions

maknaefelix: idk what youre doing but im all for it

maknaefelix: [ _contact information shared_ ]

jisunghyung: excellent

 

_jisunggg has created a new chat_

_jisunggg has added chrisbang, seobin, felixlee666, and five others to the chat_

 

jisunggg: excellent!

 

_chrisbang is typing...._

 

chrisbang: Wait

chrisbang: What’s going on?

jisunggg: i made a group chat!

seobin: with all the friends!

woojin: hey kids

minnie: oh hey

chrisbang: Why are there nine of us?

felixlee666: hey chris

felixlee666: whats going on?

jisunggg: i just added us, wooj, the kids, and felix and hyunjin

chrisbang: Who the hell is the ninth person then?

 

_minho.lee98 is typing…_

 

minho.lee98: Well, this is awkward.

 

_3rachass_

 

noballs: HAN JISUNG

han: yes? (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ

noballs: How in the world do you have Minho’s KKT!?

han: i have my ways..

noballs: Did you ask Felix for it?

han: lol yeah

 

_new chat_

 

innie: hyungs?

innie: is this another gc?

minnie: innie! alright!

felixlee666: bread is secured we got em boisss

 

_woojinkim, chrisbang, seobin, and 5 more are typing…._

 

felixlee666: i’m just gonna go ahead and apologize before y’all yell at me

woojinkim: i wasn’t gonna yell

felixlee666: really?

woojinkim: no don't ever say that again

seobin: wait do we all know each other?

seobin: bc i only know like a few of you

visualhyunjin: oooh introductions???

visualhyunjin: i’ll go first(✿◠‿◠)

chrisbang: No, no introductions

chrisbang: We aren’t doing this

minho.lee98: Why not?

minho.lee98: I want to meet your friends Christopher.

innie: i have a question

minnie: what is it innie?

innie: are chan-hyung and minho-hyung dating?

chrisbang: No!

minho.lee98: Not yet.

felixlee666: chan wishes

chrisbang: Felix, I would suggest keeping your mouth shut before certain somebodies find out some interesting information~~

seobin: wait felix

seobin: you arent telling me, your BEST FRIEND, something interesting!?

visualhyunjin: we get it you hate us

  


_do you remember~~~_

 

jisunghyung: bitch

jisunghyung: dont tell me

maknaefelix: jisung blease

maknaefelix: im straight

jisunghyung: we literally dated

maknaefelix: we both agreed it was to make hyunjin jealous and i promised you food

jisunghyung: so youre not gay?

maknaefelix: OF COURSE IM GAY IM LITERALLY IN LOVE WITH MY TWO BEST FRIENDS

jisunghyung: what am i chopped liver?

maknaefelix: no jisung blease youre my bro

maknaefelix: my bro for life<3

jisunghyung: bro<3

maknaefelix: we could always do it again

jisunghyung: fake date?

maknaefelix: yeah i think it would work plus i wanna hang out with you

jisunghyung: thats cute<3

maknaefelix: wanna do it?

jisunghyung: sure bro

jisunghyung: shit were dating now

jisunghyung: sure bro-baby

maknaefelix: bro-baby oh my god its perfect

jisunghyung: operation make changjin jealous is a go!

 

_new chat_

 

seobin: sung im naming the chat

jisunggg: whatever

 

_seobin has renamed the chat:  stray kids_

 

woojinkim: stray kids?

woojinkim: im literally 22

seobin: stray kids!

chrisbang: Could be worse

chrisbang: Jisung named our chat “3rachass”

jisunggg: you just dont know humor

felixlee666: 3rachass is clever!

jisunggg: thanks babe<3

minnie: BABE?

 

_then perish_

 

notwonpil: explain

mosquito: jisung and i are dating again!

jones: yeah!

notwonpil: like fuck you are

notwonpil: yall are fake dating again to make hyunjin and changbin jealous

mosquito: homophobe

notwonpil: anyway

jones: okay yea were fake dating

jones: please dont ruin it for us

notwonpil: hmm

mosquito: jisung will buy you lunch for the next week

jones: ill what?

notwonpil: make it two weeks and ill rub it into hyunjin that you two are a thing

mosquito: done!

jones: what just happened

 

_stray kids_

 

seobin: wait jisung and felix?

felixlee666: yep<33

woojinkim: That’s cute! Good for you Lix.

jisunggg: haha yeah we didnt wanna say anything

felixlee666: looks like the cats out of the bag<3

minnie: they told me first hahaha!

minho.lee98: Is no one gonna mention that the three of them went quiet all of a sudden and then all came back at the same time?

chrisbang: I ignore a lot of things that go on with them

innie: same

minnie: jisung and felix are so cute together

minnie: my best friends hehe

visualhyunjin: excuse me

minnie: you’re excused

  


_aussie aussie aussie_

 

bigaussie: Why are you and Jisung dating?

bigaussie: I thought you liked Hyunjin and Changbin

lilaussie: i’m trying to get over them

lilaussie: i know it wont work out

bigaussie: So fake dating Jisung is your brilliant plan?

lilaussie: i just feel like theyre so much closer

lilaussie: me joining the relationship would ruin things idk

bigaussie: Don’t say that

bigaussie: If they really cared about you, this wouldn’t ruin the relationship you currently have

lilaussie: im just idk

lilaussie: its dumb dont worry

bigaussie: It’s not though.

lilaussie: im okay chan

bigaussie: Hey

bigaussie: Wanna go for a Maccas run?

lilaussie: now?

bigaussie: Yeah, I’ll buy.

lilaussie: please<3

bigaussie: I’m leaving the studio right now.

lilaussie: i love you channie.

bigaussie: Love you too Lix.

 

_stray kids_

 

innie: can someone help me with my trig hw?

woojinkim: ask your father

bangchan: Bold of you to assume I can do math

minho.lee98: I can help!

innie: really?

minho.lee98: Sure, I like trig.

minnie: wait can i join i need help too

innie: yeah! come with!

minho.lee98: Where do you guys wanna meet?

minnie: you can come to mine and jeongins dorm

innie: i’ll send you the address

minho.lee98: Sounds good kiddos

minnie: i take it back

jisunggg: what if you invited chan to go with?

chrisbang: I’m locking you out

jisunggg: blease

minho.lee98: If Channie wants to join he can<3

minho.lee98: He made it quite clear to me at Starbucks he wants to get into my pants

seobin: oh my god

visualhyunjin: holy shit

felixlee666: disgusting

chrisbang: I literally did not!

minho.lee98: Keep telling yourself that baby boy

jisunggg: oh holy fuckin shit

minnie: this house is a fuckin nightmare

innie: i just needed a tutor…

seobin: wait minho has to be lying

seobin: chans too much of a pussy to even make the first move

 

_new message_

 

minho.lee98: Should I tell him or do you want to x

chrisbang: I swear to God you cannot tell Changbin we made out

minho.lee98: Why?

minho.lee98: Don’t you wanna rub it in his face that you “have balls”?

chrisbang: It was a one-time thing!

minho.lee98: You mean you don’t wanna kiss me again?

chrisbang: No!

chrisbang: I mean yes

chrisbang: Would you stop!

minho.lee98: Nope v(=∩_∩=)ﾌ

chrisbang: I regret buying you coffee

minho.lee98: Whatever you say baby boy

  
  


_stray kids_

 

chrisbang: You’re right

chrisbang: I have no balls

jisunggg: called it

felixlee666: hah nice one bro

visualhyunjin: bro?

visualhyunjin: you’d call your own boyfriend bro?

jisunggg: he’s not just a bro

jisunggg: he’s my broby

felixlee666: bro-baby

jisunggg: <3

seobin: right…

woojinkim: im going on a run to the market!

woojinkim: do you kids need anything?

minnie: hot cheetos

innie: i’m okay!

felixlee666: hot cheetos x2

chrisbang: A will to live

visualhyunjin: too unrealistic

minnie: yeah stick to hot cheetos like the rest of us

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 2 is up!! i really am enjoying writing this and i have plans for the future so expect a lot of updates ^__^  
> also:  
> chan and felix are stepbrothers but dont live together  
> chan jisung and changbin share an apartment off campus  
> seungmin and jeongin dorm together  
> felix and hyunjin dorm together  
> minho lives alone  
> woojin has an apartment off campus
> 
> also:  
> theyre all in college  
> woojin chan and minho are juniors  
> changbin and hyunjin and sophomores  
> felix jisung seungmin and jeongin are freshmen
> 
> i might make up what theyre majoring in and w/e but we'll see~~
> 
> thanks for reading ^__^
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	3. iii.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> woojinkim: im single too
> 
> chrisbang: So am I?
> 
> minho.lee98: Not for long~~
> 
> jisunggg: this is why im straight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UPDATE: apparently one of the pictures on ch 3 isnt showing up so i replaced it so if for some reason theres two pictures for changbins insta post lmk!!!

_new message_

 

minho.lee98: I was being serious about you joining you know.

 

_chrisbang has come online_

 

chrisbang: Why?

minho.lee98: You’re nice to hang out with

chrisbang: I have to finish up some homework

minho.lee98: Oh

chrisbang: But we can hang out afterward?

minho.lee98: Wait really?

chrisbang: Yeah, why not.

minho.lee98: I’ll text you when we’re done.

minho.lee98: Where do you wanna meet?

chrisbang: I can pick you up, I have to drop off Jeongin’s hoodie anyway.

minho.lee98: Oh, okay.

minho,lee98: I’ll text you when we finish then.

chrisbang: Sounds good.

 

_then perish_

 

notwonpil: hyunjin just texted me

 

_mosquito has come online_

 

mosquito: what’d he say?

notwonpil: he asked about you and sungie

jones: screenshots

notwonpil: [ _screenshot.jpg_ ]

mosquito: can someone translate this is too much to read

jones: he pretty much said that he doesnt know why we’re dating because he thought that you liked changbin

mosquito: pardon?

jones: and then seungmin said that you liked both of them

mosquito: PARDON?

notwonpil: but i said you two were together to get over them

notwonpil: and he got upset

jones: did he say anything else?

notwonpil: nah he kinda just left after that

mosquito: well shit

mosquito: i guess our plan is working!

jones: has changbin texted you?

mosquito: not yet but i feel like he will after hyunjin texts him

notwonpil: what are you gonna say?

mosquito: ill figure something out

 

Felix clicked his phone shut only to get a text a few seconds later, his eyes widening when he saw the contact name: _changbinnie hyung <3 _

 

changbinnie hyung<3: can we talk?

 

Felix bit his lip, he was certain it was about him and Jisung and he really couldn’t bring himself to text him back. He groaned and opened the app, typing a reply anyway.

 

yongbok<3: is it about jisung?

changbinnie hyung<3: why are you guys dating?

yongbok<3: we like each other and wanted to date

changbinnie hyung<3: then why did seungmin tell me and hyunjin you like us both?

 

Felix felt his face heat up, palms sweating slightly.

 

yongbok<3: hes being an ass and joking

yongbok<3: y’all are just my friends he was trying to be funny

changbinnie hyung<3: right

yongbok<3: i have to go can we talk later?

changbinnie hyung<3: yeah sure go ahead

changbinnie hyung<3: hey felix?

yonbok<3: yeah?

changbinnie hyung<3: i love you

yongbok<3: yeah i love you too hyung

 

_then perish_

 

mosquito: changbin just texted me

jones: and?

mosquito: i told him i didnt like him and hyunjin and that i liked jisung…

notwonpil: you are such an idiot

 

_stray kids_

 

innie thanks again for helping us out minho-hyung!  
  
minnie: yeah i actually understand now

minho.lee98: No problem!

woojinkim: seungmin i have your hot cheetos

minnie: thanks mom

woojinkim: excuse me? im dad

chrisbang: I thought I was dad?

woojinkim: it’s 2018 chan gay marriage exists

minho.lee98: Excuse me

minho.lee98: Chan is daddy

seobin: thank fucking god

woojinkim: changbin stop calling changbin daddy

woojinkim: you literally have a boyfriend

visualhyunjin: im not even mad

jisunggg: can we have a movie night?

innie: please! i miss everyone ●︿●

visualhyunjin: whos place?

minnie: we can have it at woojins

woojinkim: of course

minho.lee98: What day? Dance group has practice the rest of this week

chrisbang: I’m working all week

minho.lee98: You’re coming to movie night though baby boy

chrisbang: Would you STOP

woojinkim: sunday night? we dont have classes monday

jisunggg: yeahhhhhhhhhh

seobin: im down

visualhyunjin: if binnies in then im in

seobin: lix?

 

_felixlee666 has come online_

 

felixlee666: i’ll go i guess

jisunggg: you dont wanna spend time with me we get it

innie: can relate

jisunggg: i breathed?

innie: well stop

chrisbang: Jeongin I raised you better

innie: ★~(◡△◡✿) sorry jisung

jisunggg: hyung

innie: i apologized what more do you want

jisunggg: respect?

innie: good luck with that

 

_new message_

 

minho.lee98: Thanks for dinner by the way

minho.le98: I had a good time

chrisbang: It was nothing, trust me.

minho.lee98: If me calling you baby boy makes you uncomfortable I can stop

chrisbang: No no it’s fine

minho.lee98: So you like it then?

chrisbang: Fuck

chrisbang: Yes? Kinda? Maybe? Not sure?

minho.lee98: You’re so cute

chrisbang: Stop

minho.lee98: I bet you’re blushing right now~~

chrisbang: ... No

minho.lee98: Send me a picture

 

Chan blushed brighter at that his fingers fumbling to open the camera app and angling for a selfie.

 

chrisbang:

[ ](https://data.whicdn.com/images/320177565/superthumb.jpg?t=1538350034)

minho.lee98: You really are so cute

chrisbang: Thank you, haha.

minho.lee98: Of course baby boy

 

_stray kids_

 

woojinkim: you guys can come over around 4 for movie night

woojinkim: im gonna make dinner if anyone wants to bring snacks and drinks?

innie: i can bring drinks

leefelix666: ill bring some too

visualhyunjin: i can bring snacks

chrisbang: I’m bringing Jisung and Changbin

visualhyunjin: i already said i was bringing snacks chan

chrisbang: Disgusting

jisunggg: you think im a snack? cute

visualhyunjin: i was taking about changbin mostly..

jisunggg: its fine i have felix at least<3

leefelix666: <3

seobin: right anyway ill see you guys tonight

 

_seobin has gone offline_

 

minho.lee98: What was that all about?

minnie: who knows

innie: hes probably annoyed over jisung and felix hyung fake dating

innie: theyre only doing it to make hyunjin and changbin jealous

jisunggg: yeah probably

jisunggg: wait i mean

visualhyunjin: what the fuck!

visualhyunjin: you guys arent really dating??

visulhyunjin: it was just to trick us?

minnie: .. yeah

chrisbang: It was kinda obvious Jinnie

minho.lee98: Even I noticed

woojinkim: i thought they were just being dumb again

visualhyunjin: did everyone know besides me and changbin???

jisunggg: guess so

 

_visualhyunjin has gone offline_

 

felixlee666: thanks a lot jisung

 

_felixlee666 has gone offline_

 

jisunggg: im sorry…

chrisbang: Hey Sung, it’s okay.

chrisbang: It was bound to happen anyway, don’t blame yourself.

jisunggg: i feel bad

minnie: the three of them need to talk it out

minnie: dont blame yourself its on felix too

jisunggg: i should talk to him

minho.lee98: No, wait. Let the three of them talk first.

woojinkim: they’ll be fine

 

Felix felt his eyes begin to water, his face burrowing into his pillow when the door to their dorm opened.

“Felix?”

Hyunjin walked in and sat on Felix’s bed, his hand on Felix’s back.

“Why?” Felix looked up, eyes red.

“I’m so sorry, I-I didn’t want to hurt you or Changbin.” He felt a lump in his throat and he pushed it down, “I just wanted to make you guys jealous…”

Hyunjin snorted, “well it worked.”

“Is Binnie mad?” Felix sniffled, ears perking up when he heard the door open again, Changbin walking in, hands shoved in his pockets.

“Kinda,” Felix felt his face fall, eyes watering again, “I’m mad you lied about having feelings.”

“I thought, you guys would reject me.” Felix hiccuped, soft tears falling down his cheek, Changbin leaning in and wiping it.

“Why would we? We like you too.” Hyunjin smiled, his hand grabbing Felix’s and squeezing gently.

“Y-you do?”

Changbin laughed, kissing his cheek, “Of course we do, why do you think we always hang out with you? Or say we love you?”

“Thought you were just saying it because we’re friends.”

Hyunjin kissed his cheek this time, “we like you, Felix.”

Felix looked at the two, both smiling gently, each holding one of Felix’s hands.

“I like you guys too.”

 

_do you remember~~~_

 

maknaefelix: jisung?

 

_jisunghyung has come online_

 

jisunghyung: felix im so sorry i really didnt mean to ruin everything

maknaefelix: you didnt ruin anything

maknaefelix: actually, we’re dating now

jisunghyung: wait what?

maknaefelix:

[ ](https://data.whicdn.com/images/310103155/large.jpg)

[ ](https://78.media.tumblr.com/b9ced6c13e16e5dbadca058877fe3ad9/tumblr_p5vyf5f0nv1sojwtco3_1280.png)

jisunghyung: HOLY FUCK!!!!!

maknaefelix: hehe they came over and we all sat and talked it out

maknaefelix: and then they asked me to join their relationship?

maknaefelix: and then we kissed a lot

jisunghyung: im seriously so happy for you bro

maknaefelix: thank you bro<3

 

_stray kids_

 

minho.lee98: Woojin~

minho.lee98: Channie and I are on our way

minnie: chan? are you not bringing sungie and bin?

 

_seobin has come online_

 

seobin: hyunjin is bringing me and lix

felixlee666: yeah<3

woojinkim: i take it everything went well?

visualhyunjin: felix changbin and i are all dating<3

chrisbang: I’m happy for you kids!

visualhyunjin: thanks dad

seobin: thanks daddy

felixlee666: changbin babe please stop calling my stepbrother daddy

seobin: just for you babe

minnie: aw gross

minnie: now we have to deal with the three of them being coupley

innie: youre just jealous youre still single

minnie: so are you!

innie: yeah but im aro so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

woojinkim: im single too

chrisbang: So am I?

minho.lee98: Not for long~~

jisunggg: this is why im straight

 

 

**yangjeongin**

 

[ ](https://scontent-sjc3-1.cdninstagram.com/vp/11450a630fa5ecd89f1eaa72994e523c/5C37DAC6/t51.2885-15/e35/c0.134.1080.1080/s480x480/37328437_718104755201206_2504881818164002816_n.jpg?_nc_eui2=AeHd6AsDmFWCuU8QNuhbiOwRreCYOIkYdm-2HWcx7CVfarF7ESRsEeK9J3YrtD8w2JOCKhgry8aEk5C6nHuYJZPY)

 

**Liked by bangchan, felixthecat, binsual, and 32 others**

 

 **yangjeongin:** i’m only smiling because he promised me chocolate

 

 **j.one:** why do you have to expose me like this

 **yangjeongin:** @j.one can’t hear you over the sound of me eating this chocolate

 **bangchan:** My beautiful children! My babies! The offspring I raised on my own!

 **chickenjin:** @bangchan i think we both raised jeongin and jisung

 

**binsual**

 

  

 

**Liked by hwanghyunjin, bangchan, yangjeongin, and 50 others**

 

 **binsual:** he’s so cute maybe i’m sad

 

 **hwanghyunjin:** that’s my baby!

 **felixthecat:** @hwanghyunjin @binsual (●´ω｀●) stop embarrassing me

 **j.one:** my best friend looks so cute fuck it up best friend

 

**minhoe**

 

****

 

**Liked by yangjeongin, j.one, binsual, and 132 others**

 

 **minhoe:** He got excited when we passed by McDonald’s(^з^)-☆

 **bangchan:** DELETE THIS

 **minhoe:** @bangchan No you look cute!

 **felixthecat:** why do you look like bread

 **bangchan:** @felixthecat You are what you eat

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> added in insta bc im unoriginal and wanted to do smth kewl (sorry wont do that again)  
> just realized ive posted a chapter everyday lol idk when ill post ch4 so just enjoy this and ill update whenever im not lazy  
> also side note i am physically unable to do angst which is why it was two seconds of "angst" and then right back to crack if u wnt angst lmk? i can try?
> 
>  
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	4. iv.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chrisbang: Stop trying to be me
> 
> minho.lee98: But I am you
> 
> minho.lee98: I see me in you

_seobin has created a new chat_

_seobin has added felixlee666 and visualhyunjin_

_seobin has named the chat boyfriends <3 _

 

visualhyunjin: cute

visualhyunjin: didnt we have a chat before this one with just the three of us?

seobin: yeah but felix spammed it with too many memes

 

_felixlee666 has come online_

 

felixlee666: you say that like its a bad thing

visualhyunjin: they were pretty funny bin

seobin: just let me do this

 

_seobin has changed visualhyunjin’s name to hyunjinnie_ _♡_

_seobin has changed felixlee666’s name to lixie♡_

_seobin has changed seobin’s name to binnie♡_

 

hyunjinnie♡: wait

 

_hyunjinnie♡ has changed binnie♡’s name to baby changbinnie♡_

 

lixie♡: thats better!

baby changbinnie♡: im older than both of you..

hyunjinnie♡: still a baby(✿ ♥‿♥)

baby changbinnie♡: i cant be mad at that

lixie♡: binnie~

lixie♡: come to mine and hyunjins and cuddle

baby changbinnie♡: OMW

 

_baby changbinnie♡ has gone offline_

  


_stray kids_

 

innie: hyungs

innie: can i please rename the chat

 

_jisunggg has come online_

 

jisunggg: no!

chrisbang: Please

 

_innie has named the chat get cool_

 

minnie: get cool?

innie: yeah!

woojinkim: i dont understand but youre doing great sweetie

felixlee666: idk its better than jisungs already

jisunggg: this is why we broke up

felixlee666: we never really dated!

visualhyunjin: thank god for that

jisunggg: dont be rude!

visualhyunjin: make me squirrel boy

felixlee666: LOL

 

_felixlee666 has changed jisunggg’s name to squirrelboy_

_minho.lee98 has changed chrisbang’s name to babyboy_

 

babyboy: What the hell??

minho.lee98: Thought I’d keep the ‘boy’ theme

felixlee666: ooh ooh!

felixlee666: i have names for everyone then!

 

_felixlee666 has changed seobin’s name to visualboy_

_felixlee666 has changed visualhyunjin’s name to visualboy2_

 

visualboy2: why am i #2 this is offensive

visualboy: im the real visual of the group babe

 

_felixlee666 has changed innie’s name to foxboy_

_felixlee666 has changed minnie’s name to dandyboy_

 

visualboy: thats a good joke

dandyboy: im dandy as shit thank you

 

_felixlee666 has changed minho.lee98’s name to danceboy_

_felixlee666 has changed woojinkim’s name to oldboy_

 

oldboy: hey!

 

_felixlee666 has changed felixlee666’s name to aussieboy_

 

danceboy: No offense Lix

danceboy: But these aren’t that clever

aussieboy: do you have any better ideas?

foxboy: i like mine!

aussieboy: thank you son

foxboy: dont call me son

oldboy: yeah thats my job

 

_new message_

 

minho.lee98: Channie

minho.lee98: I’m taking Jeongin and Seungmin out for dinner if you wanna join

 

_chrisbang has come online_

 

chrisbang: I thought you were broke

minho.lee98: Never too broke for my babies

chrisbang: Stop calling me a baby

minho.lee98: I didn’t mean you

minho.lee98: You’re paying for yourself Chris

chrisbang; Then why are you paying for Innie and Minnie?

minho.lee98: They’re my children

chrisbang: Stop trying to be me

minho.lee98: But I am you

minho.lee98: I see me in you

chrisbang: Don’t ever say that again

minho.lee98: I miss taking care of something

minho.lee98: Since I live in a dorm my cats are with my parents

chrisbang: You have cats?

minho.lee98: Yes! I have two! They’re my babies

minho.lee98: Hold on

minho.lee98:

[ ](https://pm1.narvii.com/6961/9330577ad12d864a9223ff3ee913faa6ad21bb30r1-1080-1350v2_hq.jpg)

minho.lee98: Doongie doesn’t like pictures but this is Soonie!!

chrisbang: Haha cute

minho.lee98: Thank you<3 You’re cute too!

chrisbang: I meant the cat...

minho.lee98: Oh, right.

  
  


_get cool_

 

oldboy: alright fuckers

squirrelboy: dad is swearing oh god

babyboy: Wooj? What happened?

oldboy: who drank all the soju in my fridge?

danceboy: Not me, I hate soju.

foxboy: i’m underage

dandyboy: that doesnt stop you

oldboy: JEONGIN??

foxboy: i had a sip!

oldboy: we’ll take about that later young man

foxboy: ???!!!

visualboy: it wasn’t me

squirrelboy: .

oldboy: Han Jisung.

danceboy: Haha, Jisung’s gonna get his ass beat.

squirrelboy: hyunjin had some too!

 

_visualboy2 has come online_

 

visualboy2: YOU FUCKER

squirrelboy: IF I GO DOWN YOURE GOING DOWN WITH ME

oldboy: unbelievable

oldboy: both of you, buy me more soju

babyboy: Aren’t they underage?

oldboy: god damn it!

oldboy: i will buy it myself then

squirrelboy: alright! more soju!

aussieboy: jisung no

 

_oldboy has gone offline_

 

visualboy: jisung you better run

squirrelboy: im not scared

squirrelboy: i’d like to see woojin turrhrjsgdh

foxboy: is jisung dead?

babyboy: Aww man

babyboy: It was Jisung’s turn to do the dishes

 

 

**chickenjin**

  

****

**Liked by yangjeongin, bangchan, felixthecat, and 142 others**

 

**chickenjin:** red light green light swagggg bye or wassup mannnn

 

**j.one:** DELETE THIS NOW

**chickenjin:** @j.one weather feelin hot or cold

**binsual:** did you make your caption my mixtape?

**chickenjin:** @binsual yeah

**binsual:** nice

 

**bangchan**

 

****

**Liked by binsual, hwanhyunjin, j.one, and 325 others**

 

**bangchan:** Throwback to last year during finals with @felixthecat

 

**felixthecat:** i look twelve

**minhoe:** @felixthecat You are 12

**binsual:** the cutest ever!!!!! chan you look alright ig

**bangchan:** @binsual *middle finger emoji*

  


_new message_

 

chrisbang: Minho

 

_minho.lee98 has come online_

 

minho.lee98: You’re messaging me first?

minho.lee98: I’m in class baby boy, your blow job will have to wait

chrisbang: What? No!

minho.lee98: You don’t wanna suck my dick?

chrisbang: Not the point

chrisbang: When’s your dance finals?

minho.lee98: Why are you asking me? Felix is your brother

chrisbang: He also never answers his damn phone

minho.lee98: True

minho.lee98: It’s the 2nd of December

chrisbang: I should be free then

minho.lee98: You’re coming?

chrisbang: Of course

chrisbang: I wanna see Felix

minho.lee98: And me, right?

chrisbang: I guess

minho.lee98: I’ll take it(▰˘◡˘▰)

chrisbang: Minho, I don’t like you.

minho.lee98: Not yet you don’t.

minho.lee98: But you’ll come around

minho.lee98: I’ll make you come

chrisbang: Once again, never say that again.

 

_3rachass_

 

trashbin: chan

trashbin: channie

trashbin: oi hyung

noballs: Yes?

noballs: I forgot you changed my name here fuck you

trashbin: can you ask minho what felix’s favorite food is?

noballs: You’re best friends? And dating?

trashbin: and?

noballs: Shouldn’t you know?

trashbin: i wanna surprise him!

noballs: Why don’t you ask Minho yourself

trashbin: you two are closer

noballs: I wouldn’t go that far

 

_han has come online_

 

han: didn’t you guys make out the first day you met

trashbin: WHAT

noballs: Jisung how the fuck

han: minho told hyunjin and felix and felix told me

noballs: Unbelievable

han: minho hyung really likes you

noballs: I’m aware

trashbin: do you like him?

noballs: Not in that way

han: sure thing baby boy

noballs: JISUNG

 

_boyfriends_

 

lixie♡: guys?

lixie♡: where are you?

 

_hyunjinnie♡_ _has come online_

 

hyunjinnie♡: finishing things up with minho at the studio baby

hyunjinnie♡: i’ll be back soon

baby changbinnie♡: chan’s making me do the dishes so i’ll head over when i’m done love

lixie♡: okay! just text me when you’re done and i’ll head over to the restaurant and save us a table

baby changbinnie♡: sounds good love<3

 

**felixthecat**

 

 

**Liked by bangchan, minhoe, j.one, and 24 others**

 

**felixthecat:** date night with my one and only’s ♥╣[-_-]╠♥

 

**hwanghyunjin:** love you baby!

**binsual:** mwah!!!

**minhoe:** @bangchan This could be us but you’re playing

**bangchan:** @minhoe LEAVE ME ALONE

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yknow how i said idk when ch 4 would be posted ... haha good joke
> 
> anyway enjoy :3
> 
> also!  
> 3racha are producers but aren't in the idol industry, they just produce for fun and are rappers on soundcloud  
> dance line are on their school's dance team 
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	5. v.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bigaussie: Spaghetti and meatballs
> 
> lilaussie: swagetti and memeballs
> 
> bigaussie: You’re uninvited

_ dance class _

 

leeknow: I need advice.

 

_ freckles has come online _

 

freckles: i am here

freckles: i am queer

freckles: i am ready to fuck shit up

dancejin: im here also

leeknow: Oh thank God Hyunjin

freckles: hey!

leeknow: How does one go about

leeknow: Securing a boyfriend

freckles: why are you asking us?

dancejin: youre literally dating me and changbin

freckles: o ya

dancejin: wait is this about chan hyung?

leeknow: Maybe

freckles: you wanna date him??

leeknow: Contrary to popular belief I’m not JUST a sex maniac

leeknow: I have feelings and care about others well beings

dancejin: you are a nice guy

freckles: i hate that people dont think that

leeknow: Anyway

leeknow: Lix, what does he like?

freckles: hell if i know

leeknow: Fine! I’ll do this myself!

 

_ leeknow has gone offline _

 

dancejin: he’s gonna ask woojin hyung

freckles: obviously

 

_ get cool _

 

dandyboy: guys

dandyboy: im writing a resume for a job what are some of my skills

foxboy: what do you have right now?

dandyboy: “knows the lyrics to every day6 song, has gotten three stars on hard mode for every day6 song on ssjyp”

babyboy: Those aren’t really skills Seungmin

visualboy2: you obviously have never played superstar jyp

visualboy: where are you applying to?

dandyboy: a pet store!

oldboy: shouldnt you include skills involving animals then?

dandyboy: i had a goldfish for a week

danceboy: That’s not impressive

dandyboy: for you maybe

dandyboy: being a pet owner is hard

danceboy: Literally fish are so easy to take care of

foxboy: seungmin i took care of your fish for that entire week

dandyboy: because i had to go out of town

squirrelboy: i remember that

squirrelboy: didnt you name it something stupid

dandyboy: his name was prince chickpea and i miss him

aussieboy: chickpea?

dandyboy: PRINCE 

visualboy2: its things like these that make me realize im the most normal in the group 

 

_ aussie aussie aussie _

 

bigaussie: Hey 

bigaussie: Are you still coming over for dinner?

lilaussie: what are you making

bigaussie: Spaghetti and meatballs

lilaussie: swagetti and memeballs

bigaussie: You’re uninvited 

lilaussie: yeah thats fair

 

_ new message _

 

minho.lee98: Hey Channie

 

_ chrisbang has come online _

 

chrisbang: What, no baby boy this time?

minho.lee98: I knew you liked it

chrisbang: What do you want Minho

minho.lee98: Would you want to get dinner with me?

minho.lee98: I’ll pay

chrisbang: Who’s all going?

minho.lee98: I was hoping just me and you

minho.lee98: Like a date

 

_ 3rachass _

 

noballs: [  _ screenshot.jpg  _ ]

noballs: AHHHH!!??!?

trashbin: you like him dont you?

trashbin: so whats the issue

noballs: Dating is scary

 

_ han has come online _

 

han: thats cute

han: chan grow some balls and accept

noballs: I have balls!

trashbin: prove it

 

_ new message _

 

minho.lee98: Chris?

chrisbang: I would love to go on a date

minho.lee98: Awesome

minho.lee98: Uh, how about tomorrow at 7?

minho.lee98: I’ll pick you up

chrisbang: Sounds good

minho.lee98: See you then baby boy

 

_ dads _

 

bangdad: Wooj

bangdad: I need help

 

_ jin has come online _

 

jin: what’s wrong

bangdad: I have a date with Minho tomorrow night

jin: you fucker

bangdad: Pardon!!

jin: i owe seungmin $25 now

bangdad: You bet on me??

jin: we all did love

bangdad: At this point nothing surprises me anymore

jin: what do you need help with

jin: if you need fashion advice you know hyunjin is the best for that

bangdad: No it’s not that

bangdad: This is my first date since I broke up with you

jin: it was a mutual break up though babe

bangdad: Still

bangdad: What if I make a fool out of myself?

jin: like you dont normally?

bangdad: You’re supposed to be helping me

jin: sorry sorry

jin: just be yourself if he really likes you for you then why try to be someone else

bangdad: What if he doesn’t actually like me?

jin: chris i’m gonna beat your ass

bangdad: Woojin!

jin: he likes you! why do you think he flirts with you so much?

bangdad: He’s flirting with me?

jin: jesus and i thought jisung was dense

jin: why do you think he always calls you ‘baby boy’?

jin: or invites you out places?

jin: or talks about you 24/7?

bangdad: Oh

bangdad: Oh!

jin: you stress me out

bangdad: I have to go

bangdad: Thanks Wooj!

jin: of course babe its what im here for

bangdad: Love you

jin: love you too!

 

\---

 

The next day came faster than Chan expected, his wristwatch with a glaring  _ 6:50  _ staring him down. 

“What has your panties in a bunch?” Jisung teased from the couch, Jeongin sprawled across him on his phone.

“Hyung has a date tonight.” Jeongin didn’t even look up from his phone to see the glare Chan sent him.

Jisung turned and bounced up and down, “With who? Please say Minho!”

“Yes, it’s with Minho. Stop bouncing, you’re gonna break that sofa again.” 

Jisung pouted but stopped, turning back to the television, “Have fun, be sure to use protection.”

Chan threw a shoe at him.

 

_ get cool _

 

squirrelboy: chan just left for his date with minho

 

_ aussieboy has come online _

 

aussieboy: they’re going on a date and neither of them told me??

foxboy: i knew

aussieboy: wtf! im chans brother! i dance with minho!

foxboy: sucks to be you ig

oldboy: jeongin..

foxboy: *stinks to be you ig

oldboy: no i

 

_ visualboy has come online _

 

visualboy: so thats where chan went

visualboy: he was supposed to help me move my bed today

squirrelboy: i can help

visualboy: with those stick arms of yours? no thanks

squirrelboy: 

dandyboy: i bet theyre gonna fuck afterwards

aussieboy: can we not talk about my brother like that

foxboy: he isnt wrong

squirrelboy: that is if chan grows a pair

 

_ babyboy has come online _

 

babyboy: You do realize

babyboy: Minho and I are both in this chat

squirrelboy: you do realize we dont care

foxboy: hyung!

foxboy: youre on a date get off your damn phone!

oldboy: seriously christopher

 

_ danceboy has come online _

 

danceboy: Listen to Wooj baby

babyboy: I hate everyone

 

_ babyboy has gone offline _

 

oldboy: I love Minho

aussieboy: dont we all

 

 

**minhoe**

 

  
  


**Liked by felixthecat, binsual, yangjeongin, and 120 others**

 

**minhoe:** First date kinda nervous (∪ ◡ ∪)

 

**yangjeongin:** cute!!!

 

**chickenjin:** looks like you guys had a nice time

 

**bangchan:** Omg I didn’t even know you took a picture of me

 

**minhoe:** @bangchan I took lots

 

**binsual:** @minhoe send them thru

  
  


**j.one**

 

 

****

 

**Liked by felixthecat, yangjeongin, chickenjin, and 350 others**

 

**j.one:** roomies left for dates with their mans so me and the baby are hanging out( ́ ◕◞ε◟◕`)

 

**felixthecat:** look how cute my besties are!!

 

**chickenjin:** love my children

 

**yangjeongin:** @chickenjin @felixthecat <33

  
  


_ new message _

 

chrisbang: I had a good time

minho.lee98: Me too<3

minho.lee98: Don’t know if it’s too soon but

minho.lee98: Would you maybe want to be my boyfriend?

chrisbang: I would love that

chrisbang: <3

 

_ minho.lee98 has changed chrisbang’s name to minho’s _

_ minho.lee98 has changed minho.lee98’s name to chan’s _

 

minho’s: Isn’t this a little cheesy?

chan’s That’s what makes it so nice baby boy

chan’s: Sorry

minho’s: It’s growing on me

chan’s: It’s late and I have a 9am

chan’s: I’ll text you in the morning<3

minho’s: Goodnight Min! <3

chan’s: Goodnight baby

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ssjyp part is based off current events bc this hoe is addicted to it and has gotten 3 stars on most of their songs (normal mode tho hehe)
> 
> anyway sorry it took so long to update! i had thanksgiving break and wanted to relax but i have a ton of ideas for some upcoming fics so stay tuned<33
> 
>  
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	6. vi.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> squirrelboy: in the year 2018?
> 
> squirrelboy: imagine being straight i have to laugh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh in case u didnt see the rating change it gets a lil (i mean LIL) spicy in this chapter so be warned

_visualboy has changed the chat name to gay kids_

 

foxboy: what was wrong with get cool??

visualboy: nothing

visualboy: we’re just gay

aussieboy: to be fair chan wooj and seungmin are bi

aussieboy: jeongin is aro

squirrelboy: im pan

danceboy: I thought you were straight??

squirrelboy: in the year 2018?

squirrelboy: imagine being straight i have to laugh

visualboy: look its too much work to name the chat “bi, pan, gay, aro, kids”

visualboy: just let me do this

 

_visualboy2 has changed the chat name to fuck changbin_

 

visualboy: !?

oldboy: idk i like this name better

foxboy: yeah me too

visualboy: i’m divorcing you hyunjin

visualboy2: you act like i dont have felix

visualboy:

 

  


_new message_

 

chan’s: What are you doing tonight?

 

_minho’s has come online_

minho’s: I have to finish a song

minho’s: I promised Sung and Bin I would do it

chan’s: Would you want to maybe

chan’s: Come over afterward?

minho’s: I would love that

minho’s: I’ll be done around 9?

chan’s: Sounds good baby

 

\--

 

Chan drummed his fingers against his thigh, the same pulse of the track replaying over and over.

“Hyung?” Chan looked up, Jisung yawning and stretching, “I’m gonna head out, you should leave soon too.”

“I told you and Changbin I would finish the track though.”

Jisung shook his head, grabbing his bag and shouldering it, “No need, it’s almost done anyway. Besides, it’s Friday, don’t you and Minho and have plans?”

Chan thought back to the messages from earlier that day, he was supposed to meet Minho around 9 and it was already 8:30.

“Yeah, we’re going to hang out.”

Jisung smirked, “Have fun.”

“Night Sung.” Chan called, Jisung sending a wave as he walked out, letting the door click shut behind him.

Chan sighed before saving his work and turning the computer off. He grabbed his bag and adjusted his cap before heading out the door.

The walk to Minho’s dorm was short and luckily, he lived alone so there was no issue of being interrupted.

“Channie?” Minho smiled as he opened the door, hugging the older boy tight, “You’re early, come on in.”

Chan looked up at Minho’s hair, it was a darker brown. He must’ve just dyed it.

“Did you dye your hair?” Chan asked as Minho closed the door behind them, the younger smiling as he twirled a piece of hair between his fingers.

“Yeah, Felix was the one who said It’d look good.” He grinned, “What do you think?”

Chan nodded, “It looks good, you look good.”

Minho’s dorm was small, just a twin-sized bed pushed against one wall with a micro-fridge on the other wall beside his desk, an old laptop sitting on it. Minho sat on the bed, patting the spot next to him with a smile.

Chan crawled beside him, kicking his shoes off and cuddling close, Minho’s fingers tracing his spine through his thick hoodie as his other hand played with his hair.

Minho moved the hand on Chan’s back to his thigh, rubbing softly, Chan nearly purring out as Minho planted a small kiss on the back of his neck.

“Min?” Chan whispered as Minho hummed out, hands not stopping, “Do you wanna, make out?”

Minho smirked turning to face Chan and leaning in, moving his lips towards Chan’s. The air in the room seemed to heat up as the kiss grew more passionate, Minho taking control and letting their lips move in rhythm, Chan’s bottom lip being bitten and licked. Chan let out a gasp as Minho moved to remove Chan’s hoodie, landing a kiss against his bare stomach, sneaking lower and lower.

He reached his hand on the button of Chan’s jeans, looking up needily, “Can I?”

Chan nodded, holding his breath as his jeans were pulled down and tossed to the side followed by his underwear. Minho continued trailing kisses down, Chan feeling his heart rate pick up.

“I’m gonna suck you off.”

Chan had never felt his head spin so fast, his eyes following Minho as he bent down between his legs, leaving a kitten lick on the tip of Chan’s cock.

“Please” Chan breathed out.

Minho took Chan in fully.

 

\--

 

_3rachass_

 

han: chan are you still at minhos?

 

_trashbin has come online_

 

trashbin: he went to minhos?

han: yeah he said they were hanging out

trashbin: oh theyre gonna fuck

han: you think so??

 

_noballs has come online_

 

noballs: Could you guys like not get involved in my sex life?

han: snort

han: what sex life?

trashbin: did he suck your dick?

noballs: No comment

han: holy fuck that means he did!

trashbin: cant believe chan grew balls AND got them sucked the same day!

noballs: Disgusting

 

_han has changed noball’s chatname to hasballs_

 

hasballs: This is somehow worse

trashbin: give us the details chris

han: yeah we’re your best friends

hasballs: Weird last I checked you weren’t Wooj

han: fuck you man

trashbin: that’s minho’s job silly

hasballs: You know what

hasballs: I will tell Wooj instead of you two

 

_hasballs has gone offline_

 

han: YOU FUCKER

 

 

_fuck changbin_

 

squirrelboy: chan got laid and wont tell us the details

 

_oldboy has come online_

 

oldboy: he WHAT?

aussieboy: can we go one day without me knowing abt my brothers sex life

 

_danceboy has come online_

 

danceboy: For the record, I just gave him head and a hand job

danceboy: He wasn’t laid

visualboy2: he wasnt laid?

babyboy: Not yet

danceboy:

 

visualboy: you guys are gross

babyboy: Don’t act all innocent Changbin

visualboy: i breathed!

dandyboy: well don’t

visualboy: why do i feel like jisung

squirrelboy: fuck you man

danceboy: Channie

danceboy: I believe we were in the middle of something~

 

_babyboy has gone offline_

_danceboy has gone offline_

 

oldboy: so changbin

oldboy: what have you done

visualboy: no comment

 

 

_the boyfriends_

 

lixie♡: binnie?

 

_baby changbinnie♡ has come online_

 

baby changbinnie♡: yeah babe?

lixie♡: do you wanna get dinner with me and jinnie?

baby changbinnie♡: of course baby

baby changbinnie♡: where is jinnie?

lixie♡: he’s finishing practice

lixie♡: i thought i would surprise him bc hes been working so hard

baby changbinnie♡: thats cute

baby changbinnie♡: ill pick you both up from the studio

lixie♡: sounds good!

  
  


**bangchan**

  

****

**Liked by chickenjin, felixthecat, yangjeongin and 340 others**

 

 **bangchan:** Help! This man has stolen my heart!!

 

 **minhoe:** You’re such a dork

 **bangchan:** @minhoe But I’m your dork<3

 **felixthecat:** told u brown would look good hyung!!

 **seungminkim:** stop being gross on my insta feed

 **bangchan:** @seungminkim What does this say I’m blind

  


**hwanghyunjin**

 

****

**Liked by felixthecat, chickenjin, seungminkim, and 141 others**

 

**hwanghyungjin:**

felix: jinnie!! look how cute changbinnie looks!!! baby changbin!

 

 **binsual:** im older than both of u brats

 **felixthecat:** @binsual baby changbinnie!!!

 **chickenjin:** you guys look cute<3

 **j.one:** why do you always look so good @felixthecat

  
  


_new message_

 

chan’s: What do you want for Christmas?

 

_minho’s has come online_

 

minho’s: Nothing

minho’s: I don’t really like Christmas

chan’s: Excuse me??

minho’s: It’s no big deal just usually busy during Christmas and never wanna do anything

chan’s: Well not this year

chan’s: Get dressed, I’ll pick you up in twenty

minho’s: Where are we going?

chan’s: You’ll see!

minho’s: Fine

 

_chan’s has gone offline_

  


_dance class_

 

leeknow: Hey friends

leeknow: Would you guys and Changbin wanna double date?

leeknow: Like in twenty mintues?

 

_freckles has come online_

 

freckles: word!!!

freckles: where we goin

leeknow: Ice skating!

 

_dancejin has come online_

 

dancejin: im down!!

dancejin: ill text binnie<3

leeknow: felix?

freckles: yeah ofc man

freckles: chris cant ice skate to save his lfie btw

freckles: he’ll just fall on his ass

dancejin: lfie

freckles: stfu :(

leeknow: I’ll teach him!

leeknow: It’ll be cute!

dancejin: luckily changbin can skate so the three of us will have a great time

dancejin: we’ll skate circles around you and chan

leeknow: It’s not a competition Hyunjin

dancejin: fuck you everything is a competition

freckles: remember that time he raced you while you were peeing

dancejin: yeah and who won??

dancejin: me bitch!

leeknow: No one cares you can pee fast Jin

dancejin: felix?

freckles: he isnt wrong

dancejin:

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> had to change the rating lolol
> 
> happy end of finals (for me)! decided to post an update since its been a while <333  
> chapter 7 will probably be up sometime this weekend, i'll have to see how busy i'm gonna be.
> 
> uhhh lmk what you wanna see from this fic im kinda taking shit from tumblr posts and just things that happen irl for me so yeah if you want anything specific feel free to comment ^__^
> 
> (also i dont go on my main twt anymore so if u wanna follow me just lmk or w/e)


	7. vii.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Once, he convinced Jisung my dad was the president of Australia.”
> 
> “Doesn’t surprise me, Sung was pretty gullible as a kid.”
> 
> “This was last month.”

Saying Minho was nervous for their double date was an understatement. Hyunjin, Felix, and Changbin had arrived at the skating rink twenty minutes earlier than the set time, leaving Minho to begin falling into a panic at the annoying couple's antics. (“Could you guys, not make out when I’m right here?” “Like you and Chan won’t in a few minutes.”)

Minho rolled his eyes as Changbin seated himself in Felix’s lap, forcing the younger’s arms around him as Hyunjin talked to the person behind the counter and got their ice skates.

“Hyung, relax,” Felix laughed from under Changbin, “this isn’t your first date with Channie.”

Minho whined, “But it’s our first official date as an official couple!”

Changbin rolled his eyes, “Chan thinks that McDonald’s counts as an official date, you have nothing to worry about.”

Minho nodded, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. He and Chan were dating, no matter what he thought, this date would be okay. No, it would be great.

 

_new message_

 

minho’s: Minho?

minho’s: I just walked in

minho’s: Where are you guys?

 

Minho gulped, sending a quick text to Chan before turning his phone off and sliding it into his pocket.

Chan turned the corner, smiling brightly when he spotted Minho. He was in old jeans, ripped slightly and had a leather jacket on over a plain white shirt. He looked nice, but he always did. The one thing Minho could not take his eyes off of, his hair. It was a cotton candy pink and completely curly, like the sugary treat itself. Minho was in awe, no man should be as cute as Bang Chan.

“You look nice,” Minho smiled, kissing Chan softly, “this color suits you.”

Chan giggled, “Thanks, babe.”

Minho’s heart raced, threatening to pound out of his chest at the pet name. Lee Minho was whipped.

 

Hyunjin, Minho discovered, was ten times more competitive against Felix and ten times less competitive against Changbin. Felix had convinced Hyunjin to race him, the older trash talking not even ten seconds later. Changbin stood beside Minho and Chan watching, sighing and mumbling under his breath about how ‘stupid yet cute’ they were. Naturally, Felix won, Hyunjin finding every excuse in the book and turning bright red when Changbin kissed his cheek.

“Changbinnie, you and Jinnie need to race.” Felix cheekily smiled, ignoring the look Changbin sent him.

“No, Changbin isn’t as good a skater, I wouldn’t wanna race him.”

“You always let me win anyway,” Changbin huffed.

“Because I love you!” Hyunjin whined, Felix laughing, as Changbin shoved Hyunjin causing him to fall on his butt in the middle of the rink.

Minho and Chan had yet to step onto the ice, too busy watching the younger couple. Minho thought back to what Felix had said, was Chan not a good skater? This was the perfect opportunity for him to show off his skills, maybe wrap an arm around Chan’s waist and guide him across the ice, hold him tightly. That was romantic, right?

“Do you wanna skate?”

Minho turned his head so sharp he could’ve sworn it would fly off if it weren’t attached to his shoulders.

“Sure,” Minho smiled and reached for his hand, “we’ll take it easy.”

Chan smiled and squeezed Minho’s hand, leading the two of them to the ice. Minho started skating, gently pulling Chan behind him as he sped up.

“Ready to move to the center of the rink?”

Chan nodded and let go of the side allowing Minho to move them towards the center. Hyunjin and Felix were doing ridiculous tricks, Changbin rolling his eyes when Hyunjin almost fell flat on his ass.

“Can you two like, _not_ show off?” Hyunjin laughed at Changbin’s blush, “You’re annoying.”

Felix laughed, wrapping his arm around Changbin’s shoulder, “Are we embarrassing you?”

“Fuck off.” Changbin frowned deeper into his scarf, swatting Hyunjin away when he attempted to kiss Changbin’s cheek.

Minho laughed from the side, Chan wrapping his arm around his shoulder and smiling at their antics.

“Are you gonna start showing off also?” Chan quipped, moving slightly from Minho’s hold.

Minho shook his head, tightening the grip he had on Chan, “Of course not, I’m gonna take it slow with you, teach you how to skate.”

“What?” Chan froze, sending Minho a look.

“Felix said you can’t skate,” he stated, gesturing to his stepbrother who was currently screaming and skating away from his boyfriends, “hence the slowness.”

Chan groaned, his hand moving down his face, “Minho, I know how to skate. Felix was just being a shit again.”

Minho froze, loosening his grip around Chan’s arm, “W-What?”

“I can skate,” Chan pulled away and moved on his own, even showing off a bit for Minho who stood there with his mouth wide open, “I skated for three years professionally.”

Minho felt his face turn red, “I’m going to kill your brother.”

Chan laughed, “Go ahead, he likes to mess around with my friends like this.” He hummed, “Once, he convinced Jisung my dad was the president of Australia.”

Minho laughed, “Doesn’t surprise me, Sung was pretty gullible as a kid.”

“This was last month.”

Minho couldn’t control his laughter, leaning onto Chan and laughing so loud he was attracting the attention of the other skaters.

“I’m never gonna let him live that down,” Minho sighed, wiping a tear.

Chan smiled, reaching for Minho’s hand, “Come on, let’s skate.”

 

\---

 

_fuck changbin_

 

squirrelboy: guys guess what

 

_dandyboy has come online_

 

dandyboy: you finally hit puberty?

dandyboy: you found your other brain cell?

foxboy: you had your first kiss and it wasnt your mom?

dandyboy: you finally have the money to pay me back from all the times i “covered you”

squirrelboy: can someone besides seungmin and jeongin guess

oldboy: what sungie?

squirrelboy: THANK YOU WOOJIN HYUNG

foxboy: no fun

squirrelboy: i got a job!!!

dandyboy: how come you get one but i don’t!?

 

_visualboy has come online_

 

visualboy: wait seungmin

visualboy: you didnt get hired?

dandyboy: no :(

dandyboy: idk why though

visualboy: i know why

dandyboy: how come you came on just to make fun of me changbin

visualboy: its fun

dandyboy:

 

oldboy: kids

foxboy: sorry dad

 

_visualboy is typing…_

 

oldboy: if you call me daddy i will beat your ass

visualboy: youre no fun

squirrelboy: guys

visualboy2: oh right!

visualboy2: where did you get hired sungie??

squirrelboy: i got a job at the coffee shop on campus!!!!

aussieboy: ay that’s my bro!

foxboy: hmm they were probably desperate

dandyboy: at least he actually has a job and doesn't mooch off his parents for money

oldboy: SEUNGMIN

visualboy: OH HOLY FUCK

foxboy: .

 

_foxboy has gone offline_

 

aussieboy: seungmin that was kinda rude

dandyboy: im not wrong

visualboy2: hes also your best friend and you shouldnt have been an ass to him

dandyboy: he was making fun of jisung…

visualboy2: and you werent?

dandyboy: fine

dandyboy: i’ll apologize.

 

_dandyboy has gone offline_

 

squirrelboy: im sorry

aussieboy: hey no dont apologize its okay baby

visualboy: sungie, dont be upset you didnt do anything wrong

visualboy: lix jinnie and i are about to head out from the rink, wanna watch a movie when i get back?

squirrelboy: please<3

visualboy2: i’ll try and drag channie away from minho and have him join you two

squirrelboy: thank you, i love you guys

aussieboy: we love you!

oldboy: youre the cutest ever sungie, love you baby

 

 

_roommates_

 

getoffmybed: jeongin?

getoffmybed: can we talk?

 

_stopcleaningmyside came on online_

 

stopcleaningmyside: what do you want

getoffmybed: im sorry for what i said

getoffmybed: it was kind of a dick move and i didnt mean it in any mean way

getoffmybed: i just idk got kinda defensive over jisung

stopcleaningmyside: no i did go a little too far

stopcleaningmyside: im just upset because my parents cut me off so i have to find a way to cover tutition and the dorm and food and im a little stressed

getoffmybed: they cut you off?

stopcleaningmyside: yeah :^//

stopcleaningmyside: until i can bring my grades back up, im paying for school on my own

getoffmybed: jeongin why didnt you say anything?

stopcleaningmyside: idk i didnt wanna cause you or the others to worry

getoffmybed: but we can help you

stopcleaningmyside: no its fine

stopcleaningmyside: you were right, i should get a job and stop mooching

getoffmybed: i didnt mean it like that you know

stopcleaningmyside: yeah i know, but still

stopcleaningmyside: speaking of jisung

getoffmybed: no

stopcleaningmyside: im surprised the others havent realized yet

getoffmybed: if they find out ill probably kill myself

stopcleaningmyside: you cant hide this forever

getoffmybed: yes i can

stopcleaningmyside: sure jan

getofmybed: dont you have class you lil cretin

stopcleaningmyside: yeah yeah im there now

stopcleaningmyside: ill text you later?

getoffmybed: have a good class innie!

 

 

_new message_

 

chan’s: Hey

chan’s: I had a good time today

 

_minho’s has come online_

 

minho’s: Me too!

minho’s: Sorry we had to cut it short

chan’s: No worries, Jisung needed you.

minho’s: He fell asleep on my lap ten minutes into the movie.

chan’s: Aww, precious

minho’s: I had to move him though because I had to go to the studio

chan’s: Hahaha

minho’s:

 

minho’s: They’re gonna kill me if they see this

chan’s: I’m saving this

minho’s: It’s already my lock screen

chan’s: Good idea

chan’s: I should go, I promised this kid I’d teach him dance at three

minho’s: It’s 3:15

chan’s: Yeah I’m late

minho’s: Minho!!

chan’s: Okay okay I’m going!

minho’s: Bye, love you!

chan’s: Love you too!

 

**bangchan**

 

****

  

**Liked by felixthecat, j.one, yangjeongin, and 140 others**

 

**bangchan:** Headed to the studio to finish the last track for 3racha’s mixtape, it’s coming soon!

 

**binsual:** yaaaaaaaw im so proud of this one

**yangjeongin:** you are my dadddd, you’re my dad! boogie woogie woogie!

**minhoe:** Excuse me sir, can I spare a kiss?

**bangchan:** @yangjeongin I love you son @minhoe I love you baby

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha .. surprise?? it took me ages to write this and it shows considering the ice skating date was supposed to be for christmas and its now january ;-;
> 
> sorry for the little angst oof also what is seungmins secret oooooh (its like rly obvs but youll find out next chapter hehe)
> 
> anyway, hope y'all enjoy this one!
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	8. viii.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> minho’s: We should really have a chat name
> 
> minho’s: Looking at “new message” just is so boring
> 
>  
> 
> chan’s has renamed the chat to down with hets

_fuck changbin_

 

visualboy: petition to change both our names and the chat name

visualboy: breathe if u agree

 

_aussieboy has come online_

 

aussieboy: what’s wrong with the names i chose????

visualboy: everything

visualboy: well mainly the chat name is bad

dandyboy: you guys hyunjin is purple

aussieboy: WHAT WHY

visualboy2: mi holdnig ym    brethe

aussieboy: HYUNJIN OH MY GOD

aussieboy: HYUNJIN PLEASE BREATHE

danceboy: He just passed out lol

aussieboy: HYUNJIN

dandyboy: this is so sad can we get 50 likes

 

_new message_

 

minho’s: We should really have a chat name

minho’s: Looking at “new message” just is so boring

 

_chan’s has renamed the chat to down with hets_

 

minho’s: I’ll take it

 

_fuck changbin_

 

visualboy2: in case anyone cares

visualboy2: i’m okay now

aussieboy: you scared me :(

danceboy: You were passed out for thirty minutes

danceboy: It was actually quiet for once hmm

visualboy2: hello 911

visualboy2: i’d like to report an emergency

  


_si(eu)ngsungsang_

 

sungie: hey seungmin?

 

_seungie has come online_

 

seungie: what’s up?

sungie: i just wanted to uh thank you

sungie: for standing up for me earlier

seungie: of course

sungie: i know jeongin was joking but it still made me feel good knowing u cared so much haha

seungie: jeongin and i talked it out also so we’re good too

sungie: oh good!!!!

sungie: i was worried about that

seungie: yeah he has some personal issues

seungie: i’m sure he’ll tell the rest of you guys when he’s ready

sungie: of course

seungie: are you busy later today?

sungie: i have to finish some homework but i’ll be done around 7

sungie: why?

seungie: wanna get dinner with me?

 

_do you remember ~~_

 

jisunghyung: seungmin just asked me to dinner??

jisunghyung: out of the blue??

 

_maknaefelix has come online_

 

maknaefelix: wait what?

maknaefelix: did he just like text u randomly or

jisunghyung: [ _screenshot attached_ ]

maknaefelix: wildt

maknaefelix: do u wanna get dinner with him

jisunghyung: i mean yeah we’re friends but like this is random

maknaefelix: whatd u tell him

jisunghyung: fuck i left him on read

jisunghyung: brb

 

_si(eu)ngsungsang_

 

seungie: jisung?

seungie: if you dont want to its fine haha

sungie: sorry!!!! chan was asking me something haha

sungie: i’d love to get dinner with you :-)

seungie: cool ill meet you at the dining hall around 7?

sungie: sounds good!

seungie: :)

 

_3rachass_

 

han: cant come to the studio later

han: im getting dinner with seungmin

hasballs: Have fun!

 

_han has gone offline_

 

trashbin: aww sungies going on a date

hasballs: I’m so proud of him

trashbin: me too chris me too

 

 **seungminkim**  

****

**Liked by bangchan, felixthecat, yangjeongin, and 30 others**

 

 **seungminkim:** dinner with this cutie

 

 **felixthecat:** best friends!!!!

 **binsual:** have fun kiddos

 **seungminkim:** @binsual i know where you live

 **hwanghyunjin:** WAIT WHAT IS GOING ON

 

 

_best friends forever ring_

 

patrick: KIM SEUNGMIN

 

_spongebob has come online_

 

spongebob: what?

patrick: are you dating jisung??

spongebob: calm down jinnie

spongebob: we just got dinner together that’s all

patrick: “cutie”?

spongebob: i call you and jeongin cute all the time?

patrick: this is different!

patrick: because you have feelings for jisung

spongebob: i just wanted to spend time with him

patrick: did you ask him out?

spongebob: another time

patrick: 

spongebob: you’ll be the first to know

patrick: well duh

spongebob: i hate you sometimes

patrick: no you dont!!

 

_fuck changbin_

 

foxboy: hey guys

foxboy: i wanted to apologize for how i acted the other day towards jisung

foxboy: i already talked to seungmin and jisung about this but uh

foxboy: my parents decided to cut my funding for school until my grades get up and its been stressing me out

foxboy: i didnt want to say anything bc i didnt want anyone to worry about me so yeah

foxboy: youre probably all asleep bc its 3am but i couldnt sleep so thats why i sent this

foxboy: anyway i love u guys and night

 

\--

 

_fuck changbin_

 

oldboy: oh innie baby :(

oldboy: we all love you soooo much angel

babyboy: Don’t ever hesitate to let us know what’s going on at home

babyboy: I can help if you need it

squirrelboy: yeah me too!

 

_foxboy has come online_

 

foxboy: i really appreciate it guys but i dont want your help

foxboy: really ill be okay

aussieboy: like hell you are!

babyboy: Felix!

aussieboy: im gonna line up some job interviews with you on campus and see if you can get hired

aussieboy: i think we need a new receptionist at the dance building

 

_danceboy has come online_

 

danceboy: Yeah Hyunjoon is leaving so it’s yours if you want it Innie

foxboy: wait really?

danceboy: Yeah, of course.

visualboy2: jeongin would be the best receptionist

visualboy2: the people deserve to see an actual angel before they go into hell

danceboy: Excuse me

aussieboy: no offense hyung, but dance practice with hoseok-hyung is literal hell

visualboy2: i still cant feel my legs :(

foxboy: okay

danceboy: ?

foxboy: i’ll take the job

visualboy2: yay!!!  
  
aussieboy: awwww yeah

babyboy: Good for you Innie!

visualboy2: wait we’re missing someone brb

 

_visualboy has come online_

 

visualboy: i was napping and hyunjin yelled for me

visualboy: whats going on

squirrelboy: scroll up

danceboy: Hey Jeongin

danceboy: Where’s Seungmin?

foxboy: he’s on a date with jisung

danceboy: WHAT?

visualboy2: honestly hyung do you not check instagram?

 

_dandyboy has come online_

 

dandyboy: hyunjin shut it you didnt even know until it was posted on instagram

visualboy2: 

visualboy: jeongin got a job?

visualboy: sweet

squirrelboy: speaking of jobs

squirrelboy: i start tomorrow~

babyboy: Look at all my babies

babyboy: All grown up and ready to conquer the world

babyboy: I’m such a proud father

foxboy: [ _you’re not my dad.mp4_ ]

dandyboy: That’s a dead meme

dandyboy: i use dead memes in hopes that i too will be dead one day

aussieboy: mood

oldboy: are you guys okay???

 

 

**j.one**

****

**Liked by seungminkim, bangchan, felixthecat, and 209 others**

 

 **j.one:** back at it again at the krispy kreme

 

 **minhoe:** Vine is dead Jisung just accept the facts

 **j.one:** @minhoe thought u were bae.. turns out ur just fam..

 **felixthecat:** im coming by to see you later ^___^

 **chickenjin:** i thought you worked at starbucks?

 **bangchan:** @chickenjin It’s a vine grandpa

 **chickenjin:** @bangchan Chris Bang I will beat your ass

 **binsual:** @chickenjin @bangchan kinky ;-)

  


**binsual**

****

**Liked by hwanghyunjin, j.one, yangjeongin, and 450 others**

 

 **binsual:** chris and woojin blocked me so i decided to post these gems as revenge. enjoy chris drunkenly singing ‘my heart will go on’ at last year’s christmas party while woojin held the mic for him and sang backing vocals.

 

 **bangchan:** I’M LOCKING YOU OUT

 **chickenjin:** i look good so ?? thanks for the promo <3

 **binsual:** @chickenjin you looked good until you puked on my sofa

 **j.one:** didnt chan get drunk after one seagrams?

 **felixthecat:** light weight @bangchan

 

 

**seungminkim**

****

**Liked by j.one, binsual, yangjeongin, and 45 others**

 

 **seungminkim:** just a couple of dudes being guys

 

 **j.one:** just a couple of guys being dudes

 **felixthecat:** just a couple of dudes being gay

 **hwanghyunjin:** show me your dick steve

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in case u dont know the great art that based the last insta post [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1aYVFbgvRNw) u go
> 
> lmk what u want to happen bc im just making shitty vine references and scouring tumblr/twt for memes i see fitting  
> UPDATE: i posted this as SOON as i saw jeongin get his braces off an now im sad bc i have to wait until next chapter to include that so until then enjoy this baby: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DxFGNigUcAc4rM5.jpg
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	9. ix.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> felixlee666: hes just upset that honey nut cheerios took the nut out  
> seobin: just add your own  
> felixlee666: why must you do this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING!!! this chapter contains underage drinking and implied (and very brief) sexual content, read at your own discretion!

_woojinkim has created a groupchat_

_woojinkim has added seobin, chrisbang, felixlee666, and 4 others to the chat_

 

_woojinkim has renamed the chat top secret_

 

woojinkim: fellas

woojinkim: tomorrow is february 8th

woojinkim: do you know what this means?

chrisbang: It’s a Friday?

woojinkim: an important friday!!

jisunggg: the friday i finally kill myself

woojinkim: what no

woojinkim: jisung are you okay?

jisunggg: are we ever?

felixlee666: hes just upset that honey nut cheerios took the nut out

seobin: just add your own

felixlee666: why must you do this

woojinkim: all of you are dumb

woojinkim: its jeongins birthday!!!

 

_minho.lee98 has come online_

 

minho.lee98: Yeah guys

minho.lee98: Some friends you are

seobin: you didnt know either did u

minho.lee98: That is so offensive!

felixlee666:

  
  
minho.lee98: Okay I didn’t know

visualhyunjin: knew it

minnie: alright listen up fuckers

chrisbang: Hey!

oldboy: seungmin.

minnie: *fuckers and woojin

oldboy: :)

chrisbang: I’m your hyung too!

minnie: as we all know jeongin’s birthday is tomorrow

minnie: he is finally turning 18 and we are going to throw him the best surprise party ever

visualhyunjin: our baby

visualhyunjin: hes growin up(╥_╥)

chrisbang: It feels like just yesterday he was 16

chrisbang: Now he’s about to be a legal adult!

felixlee666: okay grandpa

chrisbang: 

jisunggg: what are we gonna do?

visualhyunjin: min and i planned out everything

minnie: felix and changbin are on decorating duty

felixlee666: sweet

minnie: chan and minho are on shopping duty

minnie: ill send a list of the supplies and food we need

chrisbang: Sounds good

minho.lee98: Putting me and Channie together is a bad idea ;)

chrisbang: Minho

chrisbang: I will shove you off this couch if you do not get your mouth away from my foot

jisunggg: minho has a foot fetish lol

oldboy: children please

minnie: ANYWAY

minnie: jisung youre on invite duty

minnie: wooj is on music

jisunggg: why am i not on music???

seobin: you listen to trap remixes of childrens songs

jisunggg: and i listen to the wii shop theme

visualhyunjin: rest in peace wii shop

jisunggg: 

minnie: i will be distracting jeongin with hyunjin

visualhyunjin: we’re taking him clothes shopping!

minnie: does everyone have their job?

felixlee666: yes sir!

seobin: yep

chrisbang: Minho and I just got the list, Min.

chrisbang: We’re headed to the store now.

seobin: i’m picking felix up and bringing him back to start decorating

visualhyunjin: min im omw

minho.lee98: Wait

minho.lee98: Where did Wooj go?

 

_woojinkim is typing…_

 

woojinkim: sorry jeongin texted me where everyone went in the main gc

woojinkim: i panicked

minnie: did you ruin the surprise!?

woojinkim: no!

woojinkim: told him everyone was in class or working

seobin: tbf i was in class

jisunggg: same

felixlee666: did he buy it?

minnie: innie is pretty gullible im sure he did

visualhyunjin: min im here

minnie: alright t-minus 3 hours until innie’s surprise party

minnie: let’s go team

 

\---

 

_do you remember~~_

 

maknaefelix: oh i just remembered

maknaefelix: how did your date with seungmin go?

jisunghyung: it uh

jisunghyung: it went well

maknaefelix: did he tease u?

maknaefelix: call u names?

jisunghyung: he was really nice actually

jisunghyung: he even paid??

maknaefelix: BRO

maknaefelix: he NEVER pays

jisunghyung: ik..

maknaefelix: he rly likes u

jisunghyung: hhhhh !!!!!! u think??

maknaefelix: dude

jisunghyung: im just idk

jisunghyung: we kissed

maknaefelix: YOU WHAT

maknaefelix: WHY DIDNT U TELL ME FUCKER

jisunghyung: it was just a kiss!!

jisunghyung: we didnt makeout or anything

maknaefelix: hmm

maknaefelix: still mad

jisunghyung: yea im sorry

maknaefelix: i gtg bin is glaring at me

jisunghyung: whatd u do?

maknefelix: hes decorating the apartment by himself while i text u lol

jisunghyung: tell him i hate him

maknaefelix: will do

 

\---

 

_shaggy possesses the ultimate power_

 

foxy: guys?

foxy: are you still in class?

weeb: Innie!

weeb: How’s the almost birthday boy doing?

foxy: fine ig

foxy: min and jin are taking me shopping

foxy: and then theyre forcing me to go to some dumb party

meme: innie!

meme: i just got out of class

foxy: why were you there so late?

meme: extra help for a test

foxy: we’re at the mall

foxy: be back in 2 hours

foxy: probably longer knowing them

meme: tell jinnie i love him

weeb: Have fun kiddo!

 

_foxy has gone offline_

 

meme: he doesnt suspect a thing

meme: 

weeb: I am legally disowning you

 

\---

 

_top secret_

 

visualhyunjin: GUYS

visualhyunjin:

woojinkim: THAT’S MY BABY BOY

chrisbang: My son!!!!

minho.lee98: Tell my child he looks so good

felixlee666: ^^

minnie: tell him urself we’re enroute to 3rachas place

jisunggg: *3rachass

 

_seobin has kicked jisunggg out of the chat_

 

minnie: please let him back in before he cries to me

minho.lee98: Why would he cry to you and not Channie?

felixlee666: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

seobin: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

visualhyunjin: ew

minnie: first of all

minnie: lenny face is a dead meme

felixlee666: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

minnie: second of all

minnie: shut up the fuck

woojinkim: language

minnie: *shut the fuck up

woojinkim: better

chrisbang: Jisung just called me crying

seobin: pussy

minnie: dont be mean

 

_felixlee666 is typing…_

 

minnie: lee felix send that face and i snap your neck like a twig

felixlee666:

 

  


“Guys?” Jeongin turned to his friends in the front seat, Seungmin tapping away on his phone as Hyunjin drove them to some party, “Why is everyone being so suspicious?”

Seungmin froze, fingers hovering over his keyboard, “What do you mean?”

Jeongin rolled his eyes, Hyunjin froze, his eyes boring holes into the road, “What are you planning?”

Seungmin either didn’t hear or ignored him—Jeongin guessed the latter—and continued to type away on his phone, whispering something to Hyunjin.

“This party better be good,” Jeongin grumbled, arms crossing as he stared out the window.

He missed the grin Seungmin sent Hyunjin, the elder winking at him in return.

 

\---

 

“Seungmin just texted, they’re almost here,” Chan announced, “you guys almost done with the decorations?”

Felix pulled away from the streamers, nodding as Changbin tied up the last balloon, “Yep! Just need to tape up the last photo for the wall and get the photobooth props out of Changbin’s room.”

Minho came in from the kitchen, bottles of sodas and alcohol in his arms, “Can someone give me a hand with the snacks?”

“I can,” The group turned to Jisung, voice higher than usual from sucking helium out of the balloons, “Why are you guys staring?”

“Did you suck the helium out of the balloons after I told you not to?” Chan asked with his eyebrow raised.

Jisung smiled, “Yep!” He skipped into the kitchen, patting Chan on the back and ignoring the glare he sent him.

Minho and Jisung brought the rest of the food into the living room, Woojin setting up the speakers and connecting his phone to it. Felix and Changbin hung the last of the photos up, Chan inspecting everything as Minho texted Hyunjin and Seungmin.

“They’re pulling in!” Minho yelled, the room going into chaos instantly.

Chan cursed, flicking the lights out and urging everyone to hide. He went to the door, opening it up for the three, smiling gently.

“Hey, what are you guys doing here?”

Hyunjin shrugged, “Wanted to stop by before heading to the party, Jisung said he wanted to come with so we were gonna pick him up.”

Chan noticed how annoyed Jeongin looked, his eyes scanning the room as he crossed his arms.

“Come on in, he’s getting ready in his room.”

Seungmin held Jeongin’s hand, guiding him in, as Chan closed the door behind them.

“Why is it so da-”

“SURPRISE!!!!!”

Jeongin instantly was met with hugs and kisses, all eight of his closest friends wishing him happy birthdays. He didn’t realize he was crying until Woojin reached up to wipe his face, landing a small kiss on his forehead.

“Happy birthday, Innie.”

 

The rest of the guests arrived a few minutes later and the party was in full swing. Minho had convinced Chan to do karaoke with him and he couldn’t tell if they were drunk or just having fun. Jisung was at the photo booth with Seungmin and Sunwoo, Hyunjin taking their photos. Woojin was on the couch talking with Sangyeon, Jacob, and Seungcheol, the three laughing loudly over the music.

“Hey, birthday boy!” Jeongin turned to Seungkwan, a junior in his writing class, “How does it feel to be legal?”

Jeongin shrugged, grabbing the drink from him, “Technically it isn’t midnight yet, so I’m still seventeen.”

Seungkwan laughed, “Well, I won’t tell on you for drinking then.” Jeongin smiled and took a sip, cringing as he swallowed.

“Does alcohol always taste like this?”

Seungkwan shrugged and took another sip, “Pretty much, it’s not the best taste.”

“I want more.”

Seungkwan grabbed his hand, guiding him to the refreshment table, “I’ll have Jihyo make you a drink, she’s the best.”

Jeongin lost count of how much he had to drink after Nayeon, Jihyo’s girlfriend, thrust another cup in front of him, the younger chugging it down without a second thought.

“Hey Innie, how are you?”

Jeongin turned to Chan, smiling brightly, “I’m _so_ great! It’s my birthday, hyung!!”

Chan smiled, ruffling his hair, “Don’t drink too much, wouldn’t want you sick.”

“I’m fine, Seungkwan and Jihyo made me drinks, they’re nice friends Chan. I love my friends,” Jeongin felt a tear roll down his cheek, “I love you guys.”

“Woah, Innie,” Chan rushed towards him, hugging him tightly, “what’s wrong, baby?”

Jeongin sniffled, hiccuping, “Nothing, I just- _hic_ -love my friends, my family.”

Chan hugged him tightly, kissing his cheek, “We love you Jeongin, you’re so special.”

“It’s that time folks,” Jeongin turned from Chan to the center of the room, Woojin turning down the music as Seungmin got everyone’s attention.

“Is Jeongin getting birthday spankings!?” Minho drunkenly yelled from the couch, hiccuping loudly as everyone snickered at Jeongin’s red face.

“N-no!” Jeongin panicked, glaring at Minho, “You better not!”

Minho pouted, “Channie let me give him some.”

Chan coughed loudly, Jisung patting his back as Minho smirked from the couch unphased, taking another sip of his drink.

“One day, I won’t have to hear about my brother’s sex life.” Felix groaned, leaning against Hyunjin.

Seungmin cleared his throat, “Anyway, as I was saying, it’s time for some birthday speeches!”

The room broke into small applause, Jisung walking towards Seungmin and grabbing the makeshift microphone from him.

“Yang Jeongin, my best friend, ( _“Excuse me!” Seungmin and Felix both yelled_ _at him_ , _Jisung choosing to ignore them)_ I remember meeting you when you were just fifteen. We had math together and you tutored me. You were kinda mean, but I learned that it was your way of being affectionate. I appreciate you and I’m glad we’re friends, you mean a lot to me. Happy birthday Innie, this one’s for you.” Jisung handed the “mic” back to Seungmin before downing two shots.

Changbin sighed, “Jisung is _stupid_ lightweight, this isn’t going to end well for him.”

Felix laughed, “Get Chan to take care of him, he’s nice enough.”

“You’re so right.”

“Alright,” Seungmin announced, “Who’s next?”

 

The speeches continued, the mic getting passed from person to person. Woojin sang a song dedicated to him, Hyunjin told embarrassing stories about their childhood together _(“Jeongin peed his pants during the second-grade spelling bee, it was hilarious.”)._ Felix talked about his first time meeting Jeongin, tearing up at the end and having to end his speech early. Changbin rapped a freestyle for him, Minho dancing behind him. Chan just had a proud father moment, talking about all of Jeongin’s achievements and how proud he was of him, Jeongin blushing the entire time. Seungmin gave a long speech about how much Jeongin meant to him and how he was lucky to have him, he started tearing up in the middle of it, Jeongin rushing towards him and hugging him immediately.

“I love you Innie,” Seungmin said, “thanks for being such a great friend and roommate.”

“I love you too, Seungmin. You’re like a brother to me and I appreciate you so much.”

Seungmin kissed his cheek, hugging him once more before turning to address the party again.

“Who’s next?”

The rest of the guests gave speeches too, just little happy birthdays and talking about how cute Jeongin was and how they were excited about his future. Nayeon gave him a kiss on the cheek when she finished, the rest of the room complaining how they wanted to kiss him too.

“You can all get your turn eventually,” Sana announced, hugging Jeongin so tight he could have burst, “let me hug the baby first.”

Everyone laughed (except Jeongin).

 

The party was still going strong at 1 am. Seokmin and Chanhee were dueting their fourth song, much to Kevin’s annoyance, and Minho and Chan were swaying on the makeshift dancefloor. Jeongin was laughing with Eric and Lee Chan, he was dating Soonyoung and friends with Hyunjin, over some story. Everyone was having a good time, Seungmin did a nice job of planning. Speaking of Seungmin, he and Jisung had disappeared to god knows where an hour ago and Jeongin had no idea when he would be back.

“Jeongin!”

Speak of the devil.

Jeongin excused himself from Eric and Chan and walked towards Seungmin. He was giggling like crazy, lips red and swollen and hair a mess.

“Where have you been?”

Jisung came up behind him, hair messy and neck covered in what looked like bruises, eyes drifting around the room.

“Actually, nevermind,” Jeongin sighed, shaking his head, “I really don’t wanna know.”

 

\---

 

**yangjeongin**

 

**Liked by minhoe, binsual, felixthecat, and 205 others**

 

 **yangjeongin:** thanks for such a great birthday♡♡

 

 **seungminkim:** love you innie!

 **bangchan:** Happy birthday son!

 **chickenjin:** we love you!

 

**j.one**

 

**Liked by binsual, hwanghyunjin, chickenjin and 432 others**

 

 **j.one:** felix is cheating on his boyfriends with nayeon?? more at 10!

 

 **im.nayeon:** Haha!! Cute picture<3

 **binsual:** he sang ONE karaoke song with them

 **felixthecat:** @im.nayeon pls tell jihyo noona i miss her

> ♡ _liked by im.nayeon_

**bangchan:** Damn Felix is a player

 **yangjeongin:** do you still have those pictures of him from middle school?? @bangchan

  


**bangchan**

 

**Liked by yangjeongin, hwanghyunjin, binsual, and 325 others**

 

 **bangchan:** Happy Birthday @yangjeongin

 

 **yangjeongin:** thank you dad

> ♡ _liked by bangchan_

**minhoe:** I hate his ass

 **felixthecat:** DELETE THIS NOW

 **binsual:** new lock screen

 **hwanghyunjin:** @binsual new contact photo

> ♡ _liked by bangchan_

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who's FINALLY back after nearly a month T__T i don't have any excuses tbfh im just lazy  
> uhhh sorry this is more dialogue than chat i just wanted to give u smth longer since its been forever AND SINCE ITS JEONGINS BDAY HEHE
> 
> kudos to u if u spot all the cameos <33  
> lmk what u want from me for the next update, i'd love to add in ur ideas!!!!
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	10. x.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> han: what ae you gonna change it to  
> han: "weeb nation"?  
> hasballs: Bold of you to call him a weeb when I caught you jerking off to Naruto the other night

_3rachass_

 

trashbin: can i please change the chat name

trashbin: i get sad everytime i see it

 

_han has come online_

 

han: what are you gonna change it to

han: “weeb nation”?

 

_hasballs has come online_

 

hasballs: Bold of you to call him a weeb when I caught you jerking off to Naruto the other night

trashbin: please say you were in your own bed

han: i plead the fifth

hasballs: He was in your bed Changbin

trashbin:

 

hasballs: If you change the chat name I should be allowed to change my screen name

han: no fuck u

hasballs: You literally do not control me

 

_hasballs has changed their name to chanathan_

 

chanathan: I couldn’t think of anything

chanathan: But this is better than what I had before

trashbin: wait i got it

 

_trashbin has changed chanathan’s name to daddy_

 

daddy: Seo Changbin.

trashbin: cant hear you

trashbin: i have airpods in

daddy: You don’t own airpods???

trashbin: jisung you hear something?

 

_daddy has kicked trashbin out of the chat_

 

han: thanks

daddy: I did what had to be done.

  


_fuck changbin_

 

aussieboy: im just trying to eat my soup

aussieboy: but its too hot so it burns my mouth :(

 

_visualboy is typing…_

 

oldboy: oh please god no

visualboy: but hyunjin is hot and you still eat him?

oldboy: NO

visualboy2: yeah but he usually blows me before

 

_oldboy has left the chat_

_foxboy has left the chat_

_dandyboy has left the chat_

_squirrelboy has left the chat_

_babyboy has left the chat_

_danceboy has left the chat_

 

visualboy2: worth it

 

\---

 

_fuck changbin_

 

dandyboy: alright

dandyboy: im changing this chat name im tired of it

visualboy: me too

dandyboy: im not doing it for you stfu

visualboy:

 

 

_dandyboy has changed the chat name to little emo stinkers_

 

danceboy: What the hell

oldboy: you’re doing great sweetie...

squirrelboy: i think it’s funny

foxboy: you would

dandyboy: also

 

_dandyboy has changed yangjeongin’s name to creacher_

 

dandyboy: thats better

babyboy: PEEPEE!

creacher: ime Ate year’s oald today.

squirrelboy: we’re so proud

squirrelboy: wait brb my hot pocket is done

danceboy: Wait I want a new name too!

 

_danceboy has changed their name to mangho_

 

oldboy: mangho?

mangho: Minho + mango = mangho!

mangho: Self care is eating mangoes

aussieboy: i hate mangoes

mangho: Oh die then

aussieboy: 

visualboy2: what’s with all the cat memes today?

creacher: cats are majestic creatures hyunjin

aussieboy: *creachers

dandyboy: stfu

 

_aussieboy has changed seungminkim’s name to seungMEAN_

 

seungMEAN: you are a literal child

squirrelboy: i’m back!

squirrelboy: what did i miss?

 

_creacher has changed jisunggg’s name to hotpocket_

 

hotpocket: YES

creacher: wait jisung

creacher: how’s your job?

hotpocket: it’s good!!!! i like the people i work with a lot

seungMEAN: that’s nice sungie we’re happy for you

hotpocket: thanks!

 

_roommates_

 

stopcleaningmyside: are you two dating now?

getoffmybed: no? kinda? idk

getoffmybed: like we made out at your party

stopcleaningmyside: yeah im aware

getoffmybed: but i havent officially asked him out yet

stopcleaningmyside: why not?

getoffmybed: mmmm scared

getoffmybed: what if he rejects me?

stopcleaningmyside: seungmin.

getoffmybed: i know, i know

stopcleaningmyside: you worry too much you’re gonna get wrinkles before you’re 20

getoffmybed: ew don’t even say that

stopcleaningmyside: just confess to him min

getoffmybed: i’ll think about it okay

stopcleaningmyside: good i love you

getoffmybed: love u too

 

_little emo stinkers_

 

seungMEAN **:** of course jisung

mangho **:** Why are you two suspiciously buddy buddy now?

hotpocket **:** what do you mean

mangho **:** first dinner now seungmin complimenting you and being nice?

seungMEAN **:** i’m a nice person!

visualboy **:** you pushed me off my own bed so you could lay down

seungMEAN **:** just because i’m mean to you doesn’t mean i’m mean to everyone changbin

visualboy **:** weird flex but okay

 

_kimseungmin has changed seochangbin’s name to dumbin_

 

dumbin **:**

****

visualboy2 **:** WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS PHOTO OF ME???

aussieboy **:** lmfao i sent it to him

visualboy2 **:** hello police

  


_little emo stinkers_

 

aussieboy: lads

aussieboy: the jonas brothers new song has me quaking

babyboy: Nick Jonas has me quaking

hotpocket: i’m more of a joe guy

oldboy: you’re both wrong

oldboy: kevin’s the hottest

mangho:

 

babyboy: You’re dead to me Woojin

 

\---

 

**bangchan**

****

**Liked by chickenjin, yangjeongin, binsual, and 250 others**

 

 **bangchan:** Date night with the best @minhoe

 

 **minhoe:** You posted the worst picture of me

 **bangchan:** Yeah but I look good in it @minhoe

 **j.one:** wow i love my dads

 **felixthecat:** that’s my shirt!!!!!

 **bangchan:** @felixthecat You never wear it!?

 **felixthecat:** yeah but you look better in it than me so i’m mad now

  


**binsual**

****

**Liked by seungminkim, j.one, hwanghyunjin, and 489 others**

 

 **binsual:** it’s  like they don’t even care we’re in public this is why i hate couples

 

 **bangchan:** Says the one who made out with Hyunjin in a McDonald’s parking lot

 **yangjeongin:** i remember that day wow i wish i had bleach

 **seungminkim:** gays have NO rights

 **felixthecat:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) @seungminkim

 **seungminkim:** @felixthecat begone thot

 

\---

 

_s(eu)ingsungsang_

 

seungie: hey jisung?

 

_sungie has come online_

 

sungie: what’s up

seungie: i was just thinking about us and how we’ve been like hanging out and then jeongin’s party and i was just wanting to ask

seungie: what are we?

sungie: i mean i’d hope friends

seungie: no like

seungie: do you want to be more than that?

sungie: like

sungie: boyfriends?

seungie: i guess..

 

_do you remember~~_

 

jisunghyung: FELIX

maknaefelix: WHAT WHAT IM PLAYING FORTNITE

jisunghyung: I THINK SEUNGMIN IS ASKING ME OUT

maknaefelix: FUCK

makenaefelix: i just paused gogogo

jisunghyung: _[ screenshot sent ]_

maknaefelix: oh fuck

maknaefelix: do you like him?

jisunghyung: that’s the thing

jisunghyung: i don’t know

maknaefelix: wait what

jisunghyung: like he’s fun to hang out with and a good kisser but idk if i wanna date

maknaefelix: are you wanting a fwb situation

maknaefelix: but with kissing and not sex

jisunghyung: i mean kinda but i think seungmin really likes me and i just fuck

jisunghyung: i don’t wanna fuck things up

maknaefelix: hey hey you won’t

maknaefelix: you need to talk to him

maknaefelix: in person

jisunghyung: yeah you’re right

jisunghyung: thanks lix

maknaefelix: of course sung

maknaefelix: tell me how it goes!

 

_felixlee666 has gone offline_

  


_s(eu)ingsungsang_

 

sungie: hey sorry

sungie: uh could we talk?

sungie: like in person?

seungie: yeah sure

seungie: i’ll be over in 10

 

\---

 

“Jisung?” Seungmin rasped on his door, peeking in, “Chan let me in.”

Jisung turned to the closed door with a sigh, “Come in, it’s unlocked.”

Seungmin shut the door behind him, standing awkwardly in the middle of Jisung’s bedroom. He could cut through the tension with a knife.

“What’d you wanna talk about?” He looked down, following the carpet design with his eyes as he waited for Jisung to respond.

Jisung sat up, biting his lip, “I don’t know how I feel about you.”

Seungmin looked up from his feet, “What do you mean?”

“I like making out and hanging out with you but I don’t know if I like you like- _like_ you. I mean, you’re a good friend but I just don’t know if I wanna date.”

He released a breath of air, shuddering, “And I’m scared it’ll ruin things between us by saying this but I want things to say the same, for now.”

Seungmin was quiet, staring at Jisung with wide eyes. Jisung could hear his heart pounding in his chest as the two stared each other down.

“So, you want to keep making out but not date?”

Jisung nodded, trying to hide himself from Seungmin’s stares.

“Wow,” Seungmin nodded, voice cracking slightly, “I thought you wanted to date me, with the way things were going and what you said to me at Jeongin’s party. I didn’t realize you only wanted me for a quick make-out session.”

Jisung stood up, walking towards Seungmin, “No, Seungmin! That’s not it-“

“Then what is it? The fact that I’m a jerk to you because it’s how I deal with my feelings? The fact that I was _scared_ to tell you how I felt because I was scared of rejection. It’s fine Jisung, you don’t like me. I won’t force you into a relationship.” He went quiet, taking a deep breath, “Just don’t bother trying to talk to me if you’re wanting to make out, as of now we’re just friends.”

“Seungmin-“

Seungmin shook his head, wiping his eyes, “Forget it, have a great night Jisung.”

The door slammed shut, leaving Jisung in complete silence.

  


**@seungminkim**

not bothering with feelings ever again

 

———-

 

 **@kim_wooj:** hey text me :(

 **@foxyloxy:** what happened???

 **@hyunjin00:** dude answer your phone

  


\---

 

_little emo stinkers_

 

 **babyboy:** Has anyone heard from Seungmin or Jisung?

 

_aussieboy has come online_

 

 **aussieboy:** texted sung about an hour or two ago why

 **oldboy:** did you see seungmin’s latest tweet?

 **creacher:** he won’t answer my texts

 **visualboy2:** mine either

 **mangho:** What do you think happened?

 **visualboy:** guys

 **visualboy:** jisung is gone

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry (not sorry) for the angst and cliffhanger ^3^ i currently have a plan yet no time for the next chapter so oof.. sorry friends
> 
> leave requests or just follow me on social media to see what im yelling abt  
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


	11. xi.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> daddy: I swear I’m going to kick his ass  
> aussieboy: not if i kick it first

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let's uhhhh not focus on the fact that this took nearly a month for me to update i totally didn't forget abt it pffft

Jisung isn’t a petty person, not by a long shot, but the more and more his phone vibrates the more and more annoyed he gets. Sure, he left his apartment with no warning and Chan is probably seconds away from calling a search party on him, but he cannot be bothered to respond to his oldest roommate and let him know he’s fine. He’s just lucky the person letting him crash is easily persuaded to stay quiet with sweets, meaning Jisung’s hiding spot won’t be blown anytime soon.

“You know,” the voice rings out, interrupting Jisung’s TikTok binge, “you should really tell Chan where you are. He keeps texting me, Changbin too.”

Jisung shrugs, “not ready to deal with them, they’re gonna go all mama bear on me and will wanna know what happened.”

“You also need to talk to Seungmin, Jisung,” said boy freezing and looking away, “ignoring him won’t solve anything.”

Jisung sighs, running a hand down his face, “I’ll talk to him, just-just not now. Okay?”

“Fine,” he sighs, joining Jisung on the couch, “but you owe me big time for letting you hide out here.”

 

_little emo stinkers_

 

mangho: Any news from Sung?

 

_daddy has come online_

 

daddy: Nothing

daddy: I swear I’m going to kick his ass

aussieboy: not if i kick it first

visualboy: i’m gonna ask around

visualboy: see if anyone saw him around campus?

daddy: Good idea

daddy: I’ll call Starbucks

creaher: i know he’s a grown adult and all

creacher: but i dont like not knowing where he is :(

aussieboy: what if he’s hurt?

mangho: Hey

mangho: Don’t think like that, okay?

oldboy: we’re going to find him

daddy: It’ll be okay

 

_seungMEAN has come online_

 

creacher: minnie?

 

_seungMEAN is typing_

_seungMEAN has gone offline_

 

daddy: I swear him and Jisung better fix this before I kick both of their asses

oldboy: and i’m going to let you

 

_do you remember~~_

 

maknaefelix: dude

maknaefelix: stop being a pussy and answer your phone

maknaefelix: we’re all worried sick

 

\--

 

_woojin and the kids_

 

wooj: seungmin

wooj: what happened?

lilinnie: we miss you seungmin

 

\--

 

_3rachass_

 

trashbin: jisung

trashbin: stop being stubborn and come home

trashbin: or at least text us you punk

 

\--

 

_then perish_

 

mosquito: if you guys don’t answer i’m seriously going to cry

mosquito: please i’m scared

 

\--

 

_s(eu)ingsungsang_

 

seungie: jisung

seungie: we need to talk

 

“Jisung, Seungmin is outside.”

Jisung nearly hits his head as he hears this, instantly going into a panic, “tell him I died.”

“Just talk to him!” Jisung grumbles as the door opens and someone enters into the house. He hears footsteps coming towards him and when he looks up Seungmin is staring him down, arms crossed.

“Really?” He sighs, “You thought taking refuge at Hyunjin’s mom's house was your best plan?”

“It was until he ratted me out…” Jisung mumbled, glaring at Hyunjin who smiles sheepishly from the kitchen.

“He didn’t have much of a choice, he’s my best friend.” Jisung groans, “Plus, Hyunjin might have let it slip you were here."

Jisung sends Hyunjin a glare, “If you’ve known for that long then why haven’t you said anything!?”

Seungmin sits down and shrugs, “wanted to see how long it would take you to grow up.”

“I am grown up,” Jisung’s tone is sharp, he glares at Seungmin, “you’re the one who cried because I didn’t want a relationship.”

“Do you even hear yourself right now? Fucking hell, Jisung.” Seungmin scoffs, moving away as Jisung moves to stand beside him, “You’re so dumb sometimes.”

“Stop being a dick!”

“Stop being dense!”

“Both of you, cut it out!” The two stop glaring at each other and turn to Hyunjin, the older boy with his arms crossed. “You’re both acting like children. I don’t know the whole story but I’m tired of you guys bickering.”

He turns to Jisung, “you need to text Chan and tell him you’re okay,” and then to Seungmin, “and you need to answer the group chat.”

The two are silent, not moving. Hyunjin throws his arms up, “Now!”

 

_little emo stinkers_

 

_seungMEAN has come online_

 

 

seungMEAN: hi

oldboy: KIM SEUNGMIN

creacher: you suck!!!!

creacher: why have you been ignoring us?? (｡•́︿•̀｡)

daddy: We were worried about you Min

mangho: Where’s the other one?

aussieboy: jisung?

mangho: Yeah

mangho: Seungmin have you seen him?

seungMEAN: i’m with him now

visualboy: wait

visualboy: what

 

_hotpocket has come online_

 

hotpocket: whats up gamers welcome back to my channel

mangho: Channie?

mangho: I get first dibs on the ass-kicking

daddy: Go ahead

hotpocket: yoinks!

aussieboy: JISUNG( ≧Д≦)

hotpocket: hi guys..

oldboy: where the hell have you been??

creacher: you disappear for three days and then we have seungmin tell us he’s with you?

seungMEAN: i only found him today

mangho: Where was he even hiding out?

 

_visualboy2 has come online_

 

visualboy2: no clue

aussieboy: hwang hyunjin.

visualboy: is there something you know?

visualboy2: ……

visualboy2: hi gamers?

mangho: Changed my mind

mangho: Chan, you can get Jisung

mangho: I wanna get Hyunjin

oldboy: hold on

oldboy: before you kill the children

creacher: what the hell is going on??

oldboy: yeah that

hotpocket: uhhh well you see

seungMEAN: jisung is a dumbass and can’t handle emotions

seungMEAN: and chose to be a coward rather than confronting his problems

hotpocket: well seungmin is a huge asshole

seungMEAN: is that the best you got?

hotpocket: you know what seungmin

daddy: Enough!

mangho: That was so hot

daddy: Minho… not now…

oldboy: i think we need a little sit-down

 

Their “sit-down” ended up being at Woojin’s apartment, he, Minho, and Chan crowding onto his small couch as Seungmin and Jisung were forced to sit in chairs facing each other. The two glared at each other, Chan clearing his throat.

“Alright,” he begins, “who wants to start?”

Seungmin continues to glare at Jisung, “Jisung is stupid.”

“Seungmin,” Woojin calls from the couch, sending him a look, “this is supposed to be civil.”

“Fine,” he sighs, “Jisung did something that… that hurt me, but he hasn’t made any attempt to apologize or realize it.”

Chan raises his eyebrow, “what did he do?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it... Not yet, at least.”

Chan nods but doesn’t push further, turning to give Jisung a look.

Jisung buzzes his lips, “I, I made a dumb mistake.”

Seungmin mutters something under his breath but Jisung doesn’t glare, “I was scared of my emotions and scared to come to terms with the truth and I panicked… I really messed up, Seungie.”

Seungmin looks up, “but do you mean it?”

“Huh?”

“Do you not really like me that way? You only want me to just make out whenever you feel horny?”

Woojin’s eyes widen, he turns to Chan who is equally as panicked and Minho who has a mix of confusion and interest on his face.

“No, I-I was wrong to make it seem that way. I was wrong to tell you that I didn’t want things to change. I was so scared and so stupid, I-I like you Seungmin.”

Minho gasps, Chan quickly elbowing him in the side before guiding him out of the room. Woojin follows after, sending the two a knowing smile.

Jisung and Seungmin are left alone in the room, the clock ticking loudly.

“Seungmin?”

The younger boy is quiet, staring at his hands folded in his lap.

“Say something.”

Seungmin stands up and moves to Jisung, wrapping him tightly in a hug and crying softly into his shirt. “I-I’m so sorry… So, _so_ , sorry.”

Jisung frowns, rubbing his back, “Hey, why are you apologizing?”

“Because I was an asshole to you! I-I’ve been a complete jerk at times and I tease you and just-” he sniffles, “I’m bad, with showing emotions. And yeah, the whole “he teases you because he likes you” trope is so stupid but it’s how I show my feelings. I'm bad with showing my love...I'm sorry.”

Jisung nods, running his hand down Seungmin’s back, “you tease me and I yell at you, it’s how we work.”

Seungmin laughs, wiping his eyes as he pulls away from Jisung’s chest, “C-Can I kiss you?”

Jisung leans in and whispers against his lips, “You can.”

 

_aussie aussie aussie_

 

lilaussie: chris

lilaussie: chrissssss

 

_bigaussie has come online_

 

bigaussie: What brat?

lilaussie: i was gonna text the gc but didnt know if seungsung were gucci

lilaussie: so uh

lilaussie: are they gucci?

bigaussie: They were crying quite a bit when we left them

bigaussie: But they’re cuddling now so I’m guessing they’re okay?

lilaussie: (灬♥ω♥灬) im so happy!!!!!!

bigaussie: I think they’re dating now?

bigaussie: Who knows with them

lilaussie: hold on i got u

 

_then perish_

mosquito:

 

mosquito: spill it

jones: ?

mydaysintl: ?^2

mosquito: are y’all a thing or??

jones: sorry can’t talk now i’m busy

mydaysintl: something came up i gotta go

 

_jones has gone offline_

_mydaysintl has gone offline_

 

mosquito: hey!

mosquito: (;｀O´)o

 

_little emo stinkers_

 

seungMEAN: so uh

seungMEAN: jisung and i have an announcment

aussieboy:

[ ](https://i.imgflip.com/2itd6a.jpg)

hotpocket: kim seungmin and i

aussieboy: yes???

hotpocket: are….

mangho: Oh Jesus Christ get on with it before poor Felix drops dead

seungMEAN: jisung and i are dating

aussieboy: 

oldboy: aw congrats!!

visualboy2: about time

creacher: aww yay! ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡

daddy: We’re happy for you

hotpocket: thanks guys

hotpocket: and im sorry about being a dramatic brat earlier

seungMEAN: you're always dramatic

hotpocket: ouch my own boyfriend

seungMEAN: hehe love u 

visualboy: aw gross

aussieboy: binnie~~

aussieboy: stop being mean to the lovebirds

visualboy: … fine

mangho: Whipped.

oldboy: this calls for a celebration

daddy: Dinner?

mangho: Yeah! Channie’s buying!

daddy: I what?

creacher: thanks hyung!!! ♡♡+.ﾟ(￫ε￩*)ﾟ+.ﾟ

aussieboy: sweet

visualboy: thanks dad

hotpocket: tonight at 7?

seungMEAN: im down

visualboy2: same

oldboy: see you guys then!

daddy: I didn’t agree to this!

 

 

**bangchan**

****

**Liked by minhoe, binsual, felixthecat, and 325 others**

  **bangchan:** Family dinner!!!! Thanks, Jinyoung-nim for letting us borrow your van!

 

 **chickenjin:** i love our family

 **minhoe:**  thanks for paying daddy

>  ♡  _liked by binsual_

**bangchan:** @minhoe ENOUGH

 **yangjeongin:** (∗ᵒ̶̶̷̀ω˂̶́∗)੭₎₎̊₊♡

 **hwanghyunjin:** felix looks cute @felixthecat

 **felixthecat:** not as cute as you!!! @hwanghyunjin

 **binsual:** i’m the cutest 

> ♡ _liked by hwanghyunjin and felixthecat_

 

 

 **seungminkim**  

**Liked by chickenjin, yangjeongin, felixthecat, and 75 others**

**seungminkim:** because i am in front of you, i am able to smileෆ

 

 **bangchan:** Wow I love my children!!!

 **hwanghyunjin:** MY BEST FRIENDS

> ♡ _liked by seungminkim_

**j.one:** ♡♡♡

 **seungminkim:** @j.one ♡

 **yangjeongin:** love you besties(⋈◍＞◡＜◍)。✧♡ 

> ♡ _liked by j.one_

**felixthecat:** ( ෆຶдෆຶ) stop being so cute!!!

 **bunnykwans:** is that a line from my solo??

 **seungminkim:** maybe.. @bunnykwans

 **bunnykwans:** @bangchan i’m adopting seungmin from you

 **chickenjin:** @bunnykwans good luck with that

 

 

**hwanghyunjin**

****

**Liked by binsual, chickenjin, j.one, and 400 others**  

 **hwanghyunjin:** the baby's sleeping♡

 

 **binsual:** so blessed. so moved. so grateful. never going back. never going to forget it.

 **j.one:** what a beautiful picture

 **minhoe:** Cute...

 **seungminkim:** @hwanghyunjin that's my shirt!!

 **hwanghyunjin:** and? stop being stingy bitch @seungminkim

 

 

**yangjeongin**

  ****

**Liked by chickenjin, hwanghyunjin, bangchan, and 50 others**

**yangjeongin:** ｡ﾟ✶.ヽ(*´∀`*)ﾉ.✶ﾟ｡

 

 **bangchan:** OH MY BABY BOY 

> ♡ _liked by yangjeongin_

**minhoe:** I LOVE YOU SON 

> ♡ _liked by yangjeongin_

**chickenjin:** CUTIE!!!!! 

> ♡ _liked by yangjeongin_

**seungminkim:** fuck it up best friend!

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk man seungsung outsold  
> also stream miroh
> 
> ALSO what's everyone's fav song off miroh? mine's chronosaurus mwah
> 
>  
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)

**Author's Note:**

> get cooooooooool (get cool!) i have nothing to say at all whatsoever i suck at finishing things so we'll see if i actually write more of this lmao anyway enjoy this train wreck of a fic
> 
> also, i can totally imagine minho catfishing someone and using their photos oof
> 
> lmk if u want more? or if u dont? idc honestly im just chillin
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/kwanlix)  
> [tumblr](https://bunnyiser.tumblr.com)


End file.
